Wednesday, November 14, 2007

A Mid Week Stress Break

by Savannah

Anyone who considers him or herself a tennishead has to be stressed out by the goings on in Shanghai so far this week. In my never ending search for relevant tennis news and fan posts several things happened today.

Andy Murray issued a statement that sounded strangely like he was telling the LTA which has invested millions of pounds in his tennis development to kiss his ass. Judge for yourselves.

Despite being injured for almost four months this year, I am pleased with my 2007 results and am very grateful for the help that the LTA have given me by providing Brad Gilbert as a coach but the time has come to move on to the next stage of my career. I am ranked 11 in the world and can now afford to pay my own way and so will now hire a team of experts, each to fulfil a specified role in the development of my tennis and fitness.

Good luck with your Wimbledon draw next year Andy.

Andy Murray Statement

  • Patrick McEnroe has declared that Lleyton Hewitt's career is over. It seems Patty Mac was commentating during the TMC and Cliffy Drysdale brought up Australia and the new surface that's being put in place there. He went on to say that it will play however Lleyton wants it to play. PMac made comments to the effect that Lleyton is washed up.Lleyton is really looking forward to seeing you in Melbourne Patrick. Good luck with that.

  • Mosey on over to Mens Tennis Forums and check out the pictures "Kiro" is posting from Shanghai. Nice work.

  • A nice new tennis board where the focus is tennis has been founded by tennisheads who tried to post news about tennis on a television board's sports section. The board is called Tennis Heaven. No flaming just nice tennis discussion. Nice site "Dorkgirl".
  • Venus Williams makes a personal appearance at the Manhattan Mall in NYC on Thursday November 15 at 11:30a to promote her new clothing line. Talk About Tennis mainstay GVGirl will be there and will file a full report on that board.
  • As part of her comeback Lindsay "Mamaport" Davenport will be playing Memphis in 2008. I'm sure son Jagger will be in the house. So will Venus Williams who played the event last year. Nice ladies.
  • Can someone please explain what the hell is going on with tennis pictures posted on Yahoo? It's like playing Russian Roulette when you click on picture lately. The new interns should know how to post a picture by now dontcha think?

Pictures of the Week
Well they're from last week but as you know I'll make any excuse to post pictures retreads or not. The ladies had a mandatory party to attend in Madrid. "Mandatory" and "party" do not go together but the ladies all showed up. No labels needed at this point no? And we can all rank and rate can't we?

With the holidays approaching it's time for us tennis fans to think about the perfect gift. "Miffed Max" over at WTAw has posted a list of things you may want to avoid.Then again, maybe not.

Anastasia Myskina Action figure

Toy appeared to be sturdy and ready to play with, yet no matter how careful our playtesters were the foot kept breaking off.

Super Serb Wind-up toys

Wind-up figures of Jelena Jankovic and Ana Ivanovic were well-made and nicely packaged. However, the set suffered from a curious problem—when you wind up the Ivanavic figure it doesn’t move at all, while the Jankovic figure rushes hyperactively around the room until the mainspring explodes, leading to some very Myskina-like language from our young playtesters.

Marion Bartoli Easy Cake Oven

When the product was initially tested over the summer, it turned out tasty mini-cakes using the included mixes. This fall, however, we tried it again and the unit burst into flames, then disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

Dani Hantuchova Player Piano

Piano plays like a normal toy piano, then suddenly switches to a grand piano sound, then breaks down completely only to reassemble itself. Inconsistent performance is frustrating for playtesters.

Martina Hingis Play Hot Dog Stand

Complete replica of a US Open style hot dog stand is perfect down to the last detail, with hot dog rotisserie, bun warmer and chip rack. Only troublesome feature is the Coke machine, which pumps out white powder instead of tasty cola.

Sveta Raps!!!

CD of Sveta covering hits by Dr. Dre, Snoop Dog, Eminem and other popular hip hop artists. Do you really need to know why this is on our not recommended list?

The Long Road Back Board Game

Players can choose from Jelena Dokic, Alex Stephenson, Jennifer Capriati or Monica Seles. However, due to a printing error, the board does not have an actual finish line and players are doomed to circle forever just outside the WTA section of the board.

Elena Dementieva Power Workout Set

Includes tiny weights and workout video. Weights appear to be normal, but every playtester who used this workout set ended up with mysteriously broken ribs. Plus, the included video, in which Elena constantly admonishes kids to “get mommy’s permission because mommy always knows best” before attempting any activity--including turning off the tape- is just kind of creepy.

Talking Justine

Pull the string and Justine shouts “Allez!” Pull it again and Justine shouts “Allez.” About three minutes of “Allez” and you’ll allez-oop it out the nearest window.

Serena’s Junior Racket

Appears to be a normal tennis racket. But it only works in Australia. Not recommended, unless you happen to live Down Under in which case it rates our highest score.

"Linnie" suggests this winner.

Not for the wine enthusiast:
Chateau Mauresmo 2007. Flat, with murky undertones; definitely inferior to the '06 vintage. Avoid at all costs. [Warning: could cause appendix to burst]. Wine Spectator rating: 00

And please don't forget to visit Craig's blog for up to the minute TMC coverage! Link is below.

1 comment:

paula said...

You are very funny! I love the toys/lady player stuff. Very funny. I write a humour tennis blog, too. Mine is less intelligent than yours- it's purposefully outrageous and sort of dumb.
Here's the link. I'll be checking back her during Davis Cup!