The Week in Review 11/18 - 11/24/2007

by Savannah

Let me see. What was going on in the crazy world of tennis this past week that warrants tennisheads attention? The official off season has started. The Davis Cup Final between Russia and the United States begins next week and oh yeah, the Exhibition Season has started. The exho (or exo) season is when tennis players stop being money grubbing point whores and become simply money grubbers. Hey, their careers are short and they're entitled to get all the moolah they can while they can. So lets see who had their sticky little fingers in the cookie jar this past week.

Rafael Nadal vs Richard Gasquet

Nice little deal. Richie played a one off against Rafa in Kuala Lumpur. Richie won the first set and Rafa won the next two. Looks like it was fun for both players. Rafa won 3-6, 6-2, 6-3.

(Thanks to MariaV over on MTF)

Pete Sampras vs Roger Federer

This was the Main Event this week. Sampras, who has been encouraged to return to the main tour signed up for this three match series which promised to be the throw down of the Exhibition Season for the ATP. The WTA plays exhibition matches too but when you have the man some consider the GOAT playing the man who wants that title then the floodgates open and money pours into the players bank accounts.
Exhibitions are usually scripted affairs. Usually running three sets it goes roughly like this:
Player "A" wins the first set. Player "B" wins the second set and then the third set is "for real".
This was a three match event so many tennisheads thought that the usual script would hold. In a weird bizarro world way it did.
The first match was played in Seoul South Korea and Roger won rather handily. It seems to be all the rage to appear in public in traditional Korean Royal attire. Venus and Maria Kirilenko set the precedent so how could Pete and Roger not do the same?

The second match was in Kuala Lumpur (A Challenger event was going on at the same time but really, when you have the tennis equivalent of Ali vs Frazier the guys fighting to get their rankings high enough to get into the Oz main draw really can't hold a candle to that can they?). The King of Malaysia showed up looking like he was going to a tennis match. It's refreshing to see royalty kick back and chill with the people although in a place like Malaysia I doubt if the people in the stadium were your average Joe's and Jane's.

That's the King between Roger and Pete. The other guy is a politician.
Roger won this match in straights as well but it was a closer affair with each set going to a tiebreak.
The final match of the series was played at the Venetian Hotel and Casino in Macau. I wanted to watch it figuring that Sampras was set to win at least one of these but with no Tennis Channel and every live feed shut out of this I waited to find someone online giving recaps. Zero. Zip. Nada.
Very odd I thought to myself. While hanging out on boards waiting for something to be posted Haruka casually informed me that Sampras had won the first set in a tie break 7-6(8). Her friend Gian has Tennis Channel and was feeding her the scores. Whatever it takes I figured. When the score for the second set came in 6-4 Sampras I expected fan boards to be flooded with fans discussing this event. That's not quite what happened. The ESPN board, a place I haven't been in a while has, as I type this, a grand total of 14 posts between two threads. TalkAboutTennis(TAT) has a few posts in it's "Exhibitions" thread. Mens Tennis Forums has a pretty active thread and was also the first to put up the results. The discussion seems to be that the court was "icy" and comparable to an indoor court in the 1990's. Roger was "tired" after a long season spent defending his throne. The same man who complained about the court in Madrid being too slow after Nalbandian handed him his ass and after he was supposedly consulted on it is said to have played tentatively for fear of injury in Macau. Besides, there's another exhibition set for March in New York City's Madison Square Garden the argument goes and Sampras had to win one to make it interesting for the paying public. Uh-huh.
The Roger fans are also saying that the result came about because of the "scripting" of exhibitions and that this is the one Roger was paid to lose. Some Roger fans say this is nonsense because Roger has too much pride and would never consent to losing a match, exhibition or not. There is also the argument that hey, this is only an exhibition match. Means nothing. Moving on.
It's still relatively quiet on the boards though.


Davis Cup Final

Let's be real. It's Shamil Tarpishev vs Patrick McEnroe. There wasn't any visa hanky panky this go around and Mr Tarpishev is in the States with his team.

The official line ups were announced this week.

USA
James Blake
Bob Bryan
Mike Bryan
Andy Roddick
Captain: Patrick McEnroe

Russia
Igor Andreev
Nikolay Davydenko
Dmitry Tursunov
Mikhail Youzhny
Captain: Shamil Tarpischev

There will be daily recaps by mmmm8 and GVGirl who will both be in attendance. MMMM8 will be sitting with the Russian fans. GVGirl, a member of the Netheads, will be sitting with the American contingent.

By the way Marat Safin is said to be in Portland.

In more Davis Cup news the 2008 Draw has been announced. Some surfaces have also been decided.

Russia v Serbia: Small Sports Arena "Luzhniki", Moscow, Russia - surface tbc (indoors)

Czech Republic v Belgium: CEZ Arena, Ostrava, Czech Republic - carpet (indoors)

Argentina v Great Britain: Estadio Parque Roca, Buenos Aires, Argentina - clay (outdoors)

Israel v Sweden: Canada Stadium, Ramat Hasharon, Israel - hard (outdoors)

Germany v Korea. Rep.: Volkswagen Halle Braunschweig - clay (indoors)

Peru v Spain: details to be confirmed (Who are we kidding about the surface here?)

Romania v France: details to be confirmed

Austria v USA: Ferry Dusika Hallenstadion, Vienna, Austria - clay (indoors)

Davis Cup Information


In Other News

Gael Monfils has rejoined Team Lagadere in France and has been assigned Thierry Champion as his coach. Mr. Champion was working with Paul-Henri Mathieu and it goes without saying Mr. Mathieu is not happy with the change. This ends Gael's work with Tariq Benhabiles who is now free to coach one Andy Murray if he's got the stomach for it. While no one was surprised that Murray and Gilbert didn't last long I wonder if Tariq wants to put up with being cursed at and out on a regular basis?
I wonder if Andy Roddick will man up and rehire Tariq who had him playing an all court, all surface game before he was unceremoniously kicked to the curb? We'll see.

Tommy Haas was not poisoned but he did have shoulder surgery. Talk about being a drama king...

Rafael Nadal thinks it would be a good idea to rotate the surfaces the Masters Cup is played on. This of course brought howls of protest from the Hard Court Specialists who go into a dead faint when confronted with a surface resembling the terre batue. Since the TMC will be WTF in 2009 I say wtf why not?

Michael Chang is no longer coaching Peng Shuai. He still wants to run the Chinese Tennis Authority but it seems they don't feel that way about him.

The field for the Gold Coast event in January 2008 is shaping up. Among those confirmed to be appearing are Nicole Vaidisova, Shahar Pe'er, Dinara Safina and Amelie Mauresmo.

The exhibition to be held in Hong Kong's Victoria Park from January 2-5 will so far feature the following players:
Venus Williams
Maria Sharapova
Ana Ivanovic
Peng Shuai
Caroline Wozniacki
There are rumors about Anna Chakvetadze joining the mix but nothing is confirmed yet.

The Hopman Cup teams are finalized.

Group A
Serbia
Jelena Jankovic
Novak Djokovic

Czech Republic
Lucie Safarova
Tomas Berdych

Argentina
Gisela Dulko
Juan Ignacio Chela

India
Sania Mirza
Rohan Bopanna


Group B

USA
Serena Williams
Mardy Fish

France
Tatiana Golovin
Gael Monfils

Australia
Alicia Molik
Peter Luczak

Chinese Taipei
Su-Wei Hsieh
Yen-Hsun Lu

For Order of Play information please visit the Official Hopman Cup Site

• Lindsay Davenport is scheduled to play in Auckland.

• I'd like to give a shout out to TAT and it's holiday charity drive. Donations will go to two charities - Justin Gimelstob's Children's Fund (The Valerie Fund) and the Harlem Junior Tennis and Education Program. This is a unique undertaking by tennis fans. For more information please use the above link.

The Shallow End of the Pool

Boris Becker celebrated his 40th birthday this week. Just before the inevitable party he announced that he and his latest lady were no more. They looked so in love during Oktoberfest.

Only Boris could have a party where his ex wife and sons and the recently ex girlfriend appear and he leaves with a woman who could be the clone of his wife and is so far nameless. Rock on dude.
Boris and Barbara Feltus (and son)

A more demurely attired Sharley 'Lilly' Kerssenberg

The mystery woman

The Mystery Woman and Ms Feltus

All pictures courtesy of the Daily Mail

The Week That Was - 10/8-10/13/2007

by Savannah

Tennis This Week

Lots of tennis got played this past week despite the impression the casual fan in the United States might have that the tennis season ended when the US Open did. There was the Kremlin Cup played in Moscow for example which featured all but the top three men and most of the women. There was the Stockholm Open where James Blake unsuccessfully defended his championship. Men were also playing in Vienna Austria where the number three in the world Novak Djokovic led the list of players.

Despite the Kremlin Cup being a Tier I event for the women there was a Tier III in Bangkok which is where Jelena Jankovic opted to play. There was lively debate about whether a Tier III should be played at the same time as a Tier I but there was enough tennis for everyone and the arguments died down once the tournaments started.

The one thing that struck me about the women this week was that both Williams Sisters were playing. Serena was in Europe and Venus was in Asia. Serena has made the Final in Moscow and Venus lost in the semi's to Flavia Pennetta. These are the only women carrying the torch for American women's tennis. Lindsay Davenport is on her way back but probably won't be fully ready physically until next year. After that the prospects are bleak.

Andy Roddick who pulled out of Thailand with an ankle injury but managed to play charity events in the States has done it again. This time he pulled out of the TMS event in Madrid citing a knee injury. Fans have noted that he is scheduled to play for charity again while the TMS event is taking place. Tennisheads remember the withering criticism leveled at the European men for skipping most of the US Open series and not coming across the pond until the back to back TMS events in Canada and Ohio. Andy's fans are saying it's not hypocritical for him to pull out of a TMS event in the fall after his comments during the summer. I think it is. I don't think you'll hear the European's doing the same thing though. American players are unpopular overseas as it is.
I do give Blake credit for playing in Madrid though.

By the way the Madrid field is quite deep. So is the Zurich WTA event next week. Glad to see that.

Method to the Madness

I found this on my Google home page after I made the original post. It's a nice little article about why the TMS events at the end of the year are going to be so well attended by the top players. An excerpt and the link follow.

In a season where we've witnessed de Villiers and the rest of his gang at the Mickey Mouse Club try to turn the ATP into a circus, it's reassuring to see some sensible steps now being taken towards hopefully, and at long last, having a fitting and exciting final chapter to the race to Shanghai.
(...)
This year however, the organisers are doing all they can to make sure the top 5 are there, barring any serious injury. And the players seem to have caught on. Roger Federer skipped Tokyo so that he is only scheduled to play two events in the indoor season before Paris rather than his usual 3. Rafael Nadal has been on a prolonged rest period since the USO, withdrawing from the Thailand Open to stay in Spain and heal his knee injury in time to play both Madrid and Paris. The top players should be keener to make a final pit stop before Shanghai this year, and here are some of the reasons why.

Okay so it may not be what they all play for, but an extra financial motivation sure doesn't hurt. The ATP ruled from the start of this year that a bonus of $750,000 would be handed to each of the top 4 players in the race if they had played at least 8 out of the 9 TMS events, including imperatively Madrid and Paris. So as the race stands right now, any the top four can cash in on the bonus prize money as long as they play both Madrid and Paris.

Incentives to Play

Lists of the Week
The WTA 2009 Roadkill schedule including player obligations was posted this week on
WTA World.

2009 Calendar with Top-10 players restrictions:

Jan 05 - Brisbane (no Top-10 players)
-------- Auckland (no Top-10 players)

Jan 12 - Sydney (no restrictions on the number of Top-10 players)
-------- Hobart (no Top-10 players)

Jan 19 - AUSTRALIAN OPEN

Feb 02 - Fed Cup

Feb 09 - Paris Indoors (one Top-6 and two Top-13 players OR two Top-6 players)
-------- Bangkok (no Top-10 players)

Feb 16 - Dubai (seven Top-10 players)
-------- Memphis (no Top-10 players)
-------- Bogota (no Top-10 players)

Feb 23 - TBD (one Top-6 and two Top-13 players OR two Top-6 players)
-------- Acapulco (no Top-10 players)

Mar 02 - Bangalore (no Top-10 players)

Mar 09 - Indian Wells (MANDATORY)

Mar 23 - Miami (MANDATORY)

Apr 06 - Amelia Island (no Top-10 players)
-------- Estoril (no Top-10 players)

Apr 13 - Charleston (one Top-6 and two Top-13 players OR two Top-6 players)
-------- Barcelona (no Top-10 players)

Apr 20 - Fed Cup

Apr 27 - Stuttgart (one Top-6 and two Top-13 players OR two Top-6 players)
-------- Fes (no Top-10 players)

May 04 - Rome (seven Top-10 players)

May 11 - Madrid (MANDATORY)

May 18 - Berlin (no restrictions on the number of Top-10 players)
-------- Strasbourg (no Top-10 players)

May 25 - ROLAND GARROS

Jun 08 - Birmingham (no Top-10 players)

Jun 15 - Eastbourne (no restrictions on the number of Top-10 players)
-------- s'Hertogenbosch (no Top-10 players)

Jun 22 - WIMBLEDON

Jul 06 - Budapest (no Top-10 players)
-------- Palermo (no Top-10 players)

Jul 13 - Prague (no Top-10 players)
-------- Istanbul (no Top-10 players)

Jul 20 - Portoroz (no Top-10 players)

Jul 27 - Stanford (one Top-6 and two Top-13 players OR two Top-6 players)
-------- Stockholm (no Top-10 players)

Aug 03 - Los Angeles (one Top-6 and two Top-13 players OR two Top-6 players)

Aug 10 - Canadian Open (seven Top-10 players)

Aug 17 - Cincinnati (seven Top-10 players)

Aug 24 - New Haven (no restrictions on the number of Top-10 players)

Aug 31 - US OPEN

Sep 14 - Guangzhou (no Top-10 players)
-------- Quebec City (no Top-10 players)
-------- Tashkent (no Top-10 players)

Sep 21 - Seoul (no Top-10 players)
-------- Calcutta (no Top-10 players)

Sep 28 - Tokyo Indoors (one Top-6 and two Top-13 players OR two Top-6 players)

Oct 05 - Beijing (MANDATORY)

Oct 12 - Linz (no Top-10 players)
-------- Japan Open (no Top-10 players)
-------- Singapore (no Top-10 players)

Oct 19 - Moscow (seven Top-10 players)
-------- Luxembourg (no Top-10 players)
-------- Bali (no Top-10 players)

Oct 26 - WTA Tour Championships

One legitimate question that arises is this. Rankings change. Players move in and out of the top ten not to mention the rankings from eleven to twenty or thirty. How does Roadkill handle that basic fact of tennis life? Tennisheads will be watching.

Another list circulating this week was a report on the ATP matches deemed suspect by tennis and betting authorities. Andy Murray threw fuel on the fire and said that everyone knew what was going on. He's being hauled before ATP officials to explain his comments. Guess something of Brad Gilbert has rubbed off on him huh? Next time he'll keep his mouth shut. To see the list please go
Here

Makeover of the Week
The ESPN tennis board has been totally revamped. It's now like a combination tennis board and mySpace. Blogs are allowed. Pictures are allowed as long as they're not pictures of celebrities or athletes which makes not an ounce of sense to me since it is a tennis board and most fans would put avatars of their faves as they do on most tennis boards. At least now tennisheads will get to find out if that board is kept going by one guy with twenty aliases or not.

I'll end with what I call the Picture of the Week. A lot of people would pick this one of Roger and Mirka.

But for me this was the picture of the week.

The other one is the picture at the beginning of this post.

The Week In Review 10/1 - 10/6/2007

by Savannah

Mr. Etienne de Villiers has let us all in on the reasons behind his changing the ATP tour into the WWE. I keep expecting Vince McMahon to step out from behind the curtain.

We should all work just for one person and he's a 45-year-old living in Bedfordshire called John Smith.
He is our tennis fan and he is the only person we should be working for. Ultimately, that informs the decisions of all of us who work in entertainment.

There's more.

"You have to decide which market you're in. If it's a tennis market you do certain things. If you're in the entertainment business you have to compete for discretionary time and income. We clearly are in the latter. Tennis over the past 15 years has not really done anything to change how it is presented or marketed to the general public."

Well since John in Bedfordshire England is the typical tennis fan I guess the rest of us – Asian, African, South American and maybe even Southern European had better get out of the way. I think a person of average intelligence has no problem following the tennis calendar as it exists now. With a little more work the average person can decipher rankings of players and tournaments, and with a little more work will know that the tour comes to a place near them at some point in time. The tournament can be what we now call Tier I, II, II or IV. It can be a Challenger. A future. The local playground courts. A Grand Slam. But tennis is played world wide.

I wonder how John from Bedfordshire reacted to his national tennis organization, which spent millions of pounds over the last year recruiting top coaches having to suspend some of what he’s been told are the best and brightest of the Lawn Tennis Association. With Tim Henman’s retirement and Andy Murray struggling with injuries I wonder who John from Bedfordshire is going to root for? An American maybe? Let’s see. After Andy Roddick and James Blake(by golly that guy has British blood in his veins doesn’t he) there’s…who exactly? John Isner? Still adapting to the rigors of the pro game. Mardy Fish? Uh-huh. Well maybe John likes the women’s game. Venus and Serena Williams? Not if the powers that be in the USA have their say. Wouldn’t John rather root for Maria Sharapova the stereotypical blond American bombshell…oh wait she’s Russian. She just likes the Yankee dollar (well maybe she’s asking to be paid in Euro’s now but that metaphor doesn’t work well does it?) I mean those pesky Williams sisters may have the best records of American women in recent memory but they’re well, you know, they pull out of tournaments at the last minute. They beat up poor Maria and her now it is now it isn't bad shoulder. They’re just not what tennis is all about. Fan support? Well if Maria’s shoulder wasn’t bothering her (and there hadn’t been those incidents where she turned her back on an injured opponent or took advantage of a player everyone knows has a psyche as fragile as fine crystal, the potty breaks)…uh, enough of that. The fans really like Maria. So what if they boo her or if she only wins when she’s got a draw made in heaven by the random angels and ducks out twenty minutes before a semi final match against an opponent who beat her to a pulp earlier in the year? She’s the Golden One, the future of tennis. John from Bedfordshire will rally around her for sure.

The French? We’re talking John from Bedfordshire here. Brits root for the French? Seen any pigs take flight lately? Spaniards? Italians? Argentines? Asians? Indians and Pakistani’s? Surely you jest. John from Bedfordshire wants hard court tennis. He doesn’t want to watch two guys, or gals, play long rallies requiring both physical and mental endurance. He wants slam, bang tennis. 150 mile per hour serves. Not too much thinking. Just react. That’s what John wants right? And what John wants he gets hand delivered on a silver platter. That bloke from Switzerland, the one who rarely shows emotion on court anymore with the pleasingly plump girl friend? That’s what John wants. No one shouting “vamos” or “allez”. A nice fist pump every now and then is all right with John. Like him, the people in Switzerland still use their own money not that Euro thing. John from Bedfordshire is giving a gentlemanly fist pump.
ET's World

More ATP News

The ATP announced the tournaments that will have “500” status under the Brave New World plan. The lucky tournaments are as follows.
Rotterdam
Dubai
Acapulco
Memphis
Barcelona
Washington DC
Beijing
Tokyo
Basel
Valencia
Each player will have to commit to playing four per year including one after the US Open. Funny but there is a lot of tennis being played right now no? Vienna, Moscow and Stockholm are on for the men this week. The women are playing in Moscow and Bangkok. A joint event just finished in Tokyo. Oh, my bad. There is no tennis after the US Open is there? For more on this here is the link.

Brave New World The 500

Just keep in mind these are the same marketing geniuses who change the Men’s championship playoff from the Tennis Masters Cup to something that, when you reduce it to an acronym becomes WTF. Enjoy yourselves with that one tennisheads.

More ATP Brave New World

Just in case you don’t know what the current ranking system is a fan over on MTF posted it and compared it with the new one going into effect in 2009.

*The current ranking point allocation

Grand Slam winner = 1000 points
Masters Series winner = 500 points (50% of Slam winner)
IS Gold winner = 250/300 points (25-30% of Slam winner, 50-60% of MS winner)
IS winner = 175/200/225/250 points (17,5-25% of Slam winner, 35-50% of MS winner, 60-100% of IS Gold winner)

*The 2009 ranking point allocation

GS winner = 2000 points
Masters 1000 winner = 1000 points (50% of Slam winner)
"500" winner = 500 points (25% of Slam winner, 50% of Masters winner)
"250" winner = 250 points (12,5% of Slam winner, 25% of Masters winner, 50% of "500" winner)

for example, in 2009 winning Queen's will give 250 points while winning Wimbledon gives 2000 points

or

winning Moscow will give 250 points, winning Paris gives 1000 points

Yep those point whores will be rushing to those 250 events. No wonder Queens locked Rafael Nadal in with huge appearance fees for the next few years.
The Points


The WTA

Yes they have a women’s tour quiet as it’s kept. Someone named Justine Henin keeps winning every time she plays which is not that often since her health is delicate. Without her faithful coach what would she do?

There is speculation that Venus Williams, who lost out to Marion Jones in 2000 as Female Athlete of the Year may now get that award. That would be great for tennis and recognition of the break out year Venus had back then when she was truly tennis Golden Girl…oh wait.

Tennisheads are asking why, when there is a Tier I event on Moscow for the women there is also a Tier III in Bangkok. The ATP has a Masters Series tournament in Madrid next week and there is no other game in town for the main tour. Just asking you know? Oh, and you get exactly one guess as to who the top seed is in Bangkok. If you need more than one guess here's a hint. She's Serbian. Dark hair. Exotic looks. Under six feet tall. What, you need a road map? Okay here she is.

No more hints okay?

Speaking of Venus, after seeing this while playing the Tokyo final against Virginie Razzano

the very last thing we V-nuts wanted to see was Venus Arriving in Bangkok.

We love you girl. We want you in the YEC. But not at the expense of your health. You've got some obvious injury issues. You remember what happened the last time you played with that groin problem? Your fans do. A week off may be just what you need.

Idle Chit Chat

In lighter news former tennis golden girl Anna Kournikova was photographed with long time beau Enrique Iglesias. The pics squash any rumors Anna has a bun in the oven but she appears to now be eating two lettuce leaves a day, up from one. She was also photographed with a beverage in her hand. Product placement for the former endorsement queen?


There was also a pic of Dominika Cibulkova which was obviously intended to announce to the world that she's of age. Of age for what is my question. And if this isn't a promo for CSI why is she in a bathtub?

Here is a pic of Ms Cibulkova sans the plaster and paint. You decide.


Trophy Wars
No I'm not talking about the female or male kind. I'm talking about tennis trophies. There's been a trend lately of giving paintings by some local artist as trophies. A real trophy can be put in a trophy case. A picture will just sit in your attic and gather dust. Unless you are a member of the local culture these paintings mean nothing.

Then there are the trophies that have come to be known as Alien Baby Trophies. Metz, which Tommy Robredo won this past weekend, has the penultimate Alien Child as it's trophy.

Now if you want to give a non standard trophy the picture below shows what can be done along those lines.

Now that'll work.

Note: By calling the Metz trophy an Alien Baby no offense was meant to the millions of aliens living among us. We know you all have different ways of reproducing. Handing your spawn over to tennis players is not one of your child rearing practices. Next thing you know Paris Hilton will traveling to your planet to adopt one of your children.

Idle Chit Chat 9/29/2007

by Savannah

This just in from totally FAUX NEWS:

From Tennis Entertainment Network reporter Canu Topthis:

Have You Been Offered a Bribe?

It seems that every player not ranked in the top ten has come forward to confess that yes, he has been approached to throw matches but that due to the strong moral fiber built into him by his parents, coaches, agent and publicist, he felt the need to come clean so that those investigating hapless top ten player Nikolay Davydenko don't hear their names whispered by some disgruntled mobster and come knocking at 3 in the morning hauling them out of bed and shining bright lights in their faces.

ET (Etienne de Villiers for those who don't know), has said that his sport is clean and feels encouraged by those stepping up and admitting that mobsters are trying to influence the pristine sport of tennis.
"So what if it gives the impression that every Challenger event is crawling with guys in dark glasses cornering players and poking meaty fingers in their chests while waving bags full of Euros under their noses? Our players will not succumb to bribery and this has been shown by the men stepping up in droves."

You would think Larry Scott, embattled head of the WTA would be happy that so far the only whiff of corruption has been a mere $1 million dollar bet for a match featuring two players many beyond the tennis world (and some in it) have never heard of. Instead he's rumored to be wondering why no one thinks his WTA matches are worth mob attention. I say give Scott a break. It's bad enough that a woman barely out of the birthing room has come back and beaten top twenty players including the World Number 3 and that his Golden Girl seems to be having intermittent shoulder problems, something new to the world of tennis where shoulder injuries are often career ending. A distraction, any distraction would be good right about now malicious tongues are saying.

While some would start "Player Confessions of the Day" watches I think this is good for tennis. The more exposure given to the pressures players are under the more excuses they can come up with for losing to a player ranked #450.
"I mean come on. Three guys in black suits and dark glasses cornered me as I walked to the court. Each one had a bag with at least $200,000 Euros in it. Not that I counted and of course I said no but can you imagine what something like this does to your mental preparation?!" a player could say after losing and walking to his Honda to drive to the next event.


The Hoffman Family Chronicles

Once again Mariana Alves is at the center of chaos and mayhem on a tennis court. After a bad call and some alleged gamesmanship by Daniela Hantuchova (Gamesmanship in womens tennis? You mean bathroom breaks, outfit changes, turning your back just as your opponent is about to serve and hand raising along with gastric distress aren't part of the game? I am shocked and appalled I tell you. Shocked and appalled.)

But I digress. The Hoffmans, husband Rainer and wife, pro player Patty Schnyder, took exception to some of the calls and antics of Daniela Hantuchova and after Patty lost the match Rainer had had enough. It was bad enough that Patty merely slapped hands (and not in a good way) at the net. Rainer gave Ms Alves a piece of his mind before, well, see for yourself. Imagine if Richard Williams or Damir Dokic did this folks. Let's see what happens to Rainer. Will he have to coach Sania Mirza while he's suspended from coaching his wife?

Dani - Schnyder -- after the match
Uploaded by BlueDragon110

Bait and Switch

The post US Open Asian tournaments continue to be plagued by the withdrawal of marquee names. Roger Federer, citing fatigue withdrew from the ATP event in Tokyo where he is the defending champion. Andy Roddick had also withdrawn due to an ankle injury he sustained while in Bangkok. I'm not sure what James Blake's reason for withdrawal was since I haven't seen an announcement yet. I just know that when the Main Draw for Tokyo came out his name was missing and the top alternate was in.

The thing is unless you're a denizen of tennis fan boards you would have no idea that any of this was going on in Tokyo. When I looked at the tournament site this morning Roger's face was still featured prominently. The WTA does this sort of thing all the time as I've mentioned before. It seems the ATP is now sinking to the same level.

The YEC


Will Venus make it in? Unlike the TMC where only two spots are open the YEC has only four qualifiers so far as Ana Ivanovic shows below.


Other possible entrants are Marion Bartoli, Daniela Hantuchova but as is usual with the WTA we probably won't know until the day before the tournament is set to begin.

The TMC

With three of the eight positions filled and the next three looking as if they may be on lock down by the men in position to fill them unless something drastic happens the battle for the seventh and eight spots is wide open.
Among the contenders are the following men:
Berdych, Gasquet, Gonzales, Blake, Haas, Robredo, Ljubicic and Moya.
The indoor season will go a long way to determine who gets in among this crowd. Who do I like to make it in? He's already in...oh you mean from this crew? James Blake, the Davis Cup dead rubber specialist? Haas? WTH has Ljubo done this year to even deserve to get in? Carlos has has some good results lately. Gasquet, with new coach Yannick Noah might get in if he manages to make some good runs. Berdych? He made it to a semi where he lost to Benjamin Becker. Gasquet beat Fabrice Santoro, The Magician, easily in Mumbai. This might go right down to the wire but for very different reasons than the YEC.

NOTE: I erroneously stated that six slots had been filled. As Mariya pointed out (and after looking once again at Craig's "Race to the TMC" I amended my comments. Sorry to have mislead people.

This 'n That

Agnes Szavay, the young woman everyone is watching in the WTA, is worrying fans with her injury woes.

Tatiana Golovin was featured in the French sports magazine L'Equipe. Craig already featured the pics. This one is my favorite.

Kim Clijsters made a public appearance on a roller coaster. I think that's in the top ten of things not to do when you're pregnant.

Arnaud Clement doing that thing most French men are good at. Not that silly. Cooking of course.

Sveta at the Great Wall of China


Marat mobbed by fans leaving the DC site in Moscow last weekend.

Couple of great pics from a photoshoot done by LeBron James and Maria Sharapova for The United Nations.


Uhm, apparently Novak Djokovic has been seeing this young woman for a couple of years now. Her name is Jelena Ristic and she's a student. What does this do to Maria and Novak? Was their night of drunken bacchanal just that, a one night stand? How does Ms Ristic feel about her boyfriend getting drunk with Russian Golden Girls?! Ah the plot thickens. Publicists, get to steppin'.

Paradorn and his bride to be bought a luxury home in his native Thailand.


In the category of what the hell were they thinking are these two pics. One of is Gael Monfils channeling his inner androgyne. The other is of Maria Kirilenko wearing the most god awful tennis related apparel I've ever seen.
Gael Monfils

Maria Kirilenko

End Notes
MV wants all of her fans to know she's taken a sabbatical. Now that she and Captain Wasabi are steering of their own ship she hasn't had time to write her blog. I spoke to her last week however and she did say in passing that now that she's gotten rid of the Samurai sword, the space age commode, and all the other junk (her term not mine) the Captain brought back from Japan she'd be damned if she let him enter that country again. I think the last straw was when she wandered into the kitchen - totally by accident she said so Fed fans don't worry, there's no chance of your fave getting food poisoning - and found a bottle of Wasabi in one of the cabinets.
The Captain swore he hadn't just purchased it but our girl was taking no chances. I guess I was the only one not totally surprised that the Captain pulled out of an event where he was defending champion.
I'm also sad to report that she and HFPY are still estranged.
I do hope she'll have time to write a little something for us after the TMC...oh wait, the exo season starts after that. You know about the Exo Season. It's that time of year when all the injuries vanish and players who were last seen hobbling on crutches are suddenly running around the court like jackrabbits. I guess it's something about the do-re-mi of that time of year that heals all wounds.

(If you have to ask why I used the sign for Euros and not the sign for US Dollars have you seen the exchange rate lately?)

The Year That Was - 2004

The final three months. It was suggested that I find and post the year 2005. I'll look for it this weekend.

As I read this while editing it all I could do is shake my head.

OCTOBER

Credit ATP CEO Mark Miles for taking advantage of the money gushing out of China, this week visiting the construction site for the 2005 Tennis Masters Cup in Shanghai and the Thailand Open in Bangkok after a stop last week in Beijing to meet with government and industry leaders. "The ATP is developing a strategy that will benefit all stakeholders in tennis in Asia," Miles said. That strategy can be broken down into two words: 'Receive money.' "Just as Asia is becoming a growth engine of the world economy, so too will Asia become a growth engine for our sport." You'll really see how much money they have if an Asian CEO replaces Miles next year when he steps down the from the position, which he has held since 1991...Korean sports writer Jong-Seok Kim covering Maria Sharapova in Seoul: "Over 5,000 spectators filled the Seoul Olympic tennis court on a quiet weekday afternoon after a big Chuseok holiday. That's how much the fans felt feverish over the "Tennis Fairy" before them, who was flying around the court with her long legs, aware of herself as the center of attention and motivated by the eyes of the crowd, which followed her every move."...Maria Sharapova reportedly received $300,000 from organizers to play the WTA Seoul event, more than double the $140K the winner receives...USTA President Alan Schwartz stuck his foot in his mouth again Thursday, insinuating he would not want Andre Agassi to play in the Davis Cup final on clay at Spain: "This is a decision of captain PatrickMcEnroe and we will respect it, but with the presence of players of the quality of the Bryan brothers in the double's match, plus Andy Roddick and Mardy Fish, we are confident and are proud of them." Wow, haven't heard 'Mardy Fish,' 'clay,' and 'quality' used in the same sentence before. To fully demonstrate his tennis knowledge, Schwartz then added "all those who know something about tennis (said the man who badly bungled Svetlana Kuznetsova's name during the US Open trophy presentation) are aware that Spain has 15 players among the Top 100, while the US has nine and is second." Well, at least you have the USTA staff to feed you stats...Kim Clijsters' doctor(s) have told her the wrist injury is a new one, unrelated to her previously surgically-repaired problem, and will keep her out of action until 2005...Andre Agassi's ninth Grand Slam for Children charity event this past weekend announced a total of $6.1 million from ticket and tables sales and the live auction. Some of the star guests were Robin Williams, musician John Mayer and TV's grating Dr. Phil McGraw. Dinner for two with Williams went for $280,000, while Mayer's guitar went for $140,000...Martina Navratilova has confirmed she will play the 2005 Australian Open, at least in doubles. That was a short retirement...Kim Clijsters on her website says her wrist is back in a brace for the next six weeks, with no surgery required...Aussie singer Delta Goodrem says she and Mark Philippoussis are still an item: "Mark and I sent 20 texts to each other this weekend." True love in the 21st century...Serena and Venus Williams attended the secret Tiger Woods wedding...While Andy Roddick's arm injury and a need for a break is enough to keep him off the ATP European indoor swing, it's not enough to keep him from raking in the exhibition cash in the U.S. -- Roddick played his second consecutive exhibition last night in North Dakota after an outing the previous night in California, losing to Andre Agassi 6-4, 7-6(8)...Andre Agassi says no chance he'll play the Davis Cup final at Spain in November: "My reasons for not playing Davis Cup have nothing to do with winning or losing. I'm growing tired, have a family, and it's time for the young guys who have gotten the team to the final to have the opportunity to win it." Yeah, who needs a former French Open champ on the team while playing on red clay when you have two guys with fast-court games who have never reached the French quarterfinals?...From the Charleston Post & Courier: "News of (Andy) Roddick's elbow injury last Sunday while losing to Roger Federer in the final of a tournament in Bangkok came only nine days after Roddick's blistering 155 mph serve during the Davis Cup semifinal at Family Circle Tennis Center. It also might be worth mentioning that in a meaningless dead rubber match on Sunday of the Davis Cup, Roddick lost control of his racket on a serve, then shook his right hand as if in pain." Don't worry, coach Brad Gilbert has predicted Andy will eventually hit a 160 mph serve -- maybe then you'll see his whole arm fly off. Easy Brad, the kid has limits...Another headline from the entertainingly loose-cannon ATP Masters Series-Madrid website: "Agassi arrives in Madrid while Roddick, Hewitt make their excuses." How will the ATP get a rein on their top players pulling from their top-level events, with some (Hewitt) not even bothering to come up with injury excuses anymore? Back in the day when the tour had bank, that year-end bonus pool sure was handy for keeping players in line. Perhaps once China buys the CEO slot next year they can start waving bills in front of the players again and get them to post for the top-tier events...In a move that would make Billie Jean King go for the throat, next week's ATP Masters Series-Madrid event has announced it is replacing its ball kids with fashion models aged 19-27. "Before taking them on court to practice, we have shown them a bit about the sport, how you play, what a "set" is, what a "game" is, and an "ace,"" explained their ball coach Julio Nieto, speaking to Eurosport. "They will add beauty, but we still have to work on a lot of details so everything works smoothly. The important thing is for them not to disrupt the rhythm of the game or distract the players." Good luck, a lot of hot models stumbling around the court between points, that won't distract players...After her win at Moscow last week, Anastasia Myskina admitted she is still haunted by her tearful Olympic collapse when she led eventual gold medalist Justine Henin-Hardenne 5-1 in the final set in the semis: "It was a nightmare. I couldn't sleep, waking up in the middle of the night for several days just thinking about that match...The Olympics mean more to me that even the grand slams...Yes, my form definitely suffered after Athens, but more than anything it was my mental state as I was still coming to terms with my Olympic failure. But time heals any wounds, so I think eventually I'll be able to recover, although now I still have those nightmares from time to time."...Jelena Dokic will try and stop the bleeding of early-round losses after -- get ready -- reuniting with crazy dad Damir, who she just recently accused of destroying her career. "I'm starting from scratch," Dokic told Belgrade's Sport. "I have two to three months to prepare before my next tournament." Damir, if you've forgotten, had moved his family from Australia to Serbia-Montenegro after accusing Aussie Open organizers of rigging the draw against his daughter, accused his daughter's coach of drugging her, accused her of needing psychiatric help and of being on drugs, and has been kicked out of both WTA and grand slam events, banned for six months from WTA events for abusive behavior. "Whatever happened, happened," Damir said. "Jelena had shown that she's a great player. She was in crisis. The time has come to correct that." Who said 2005 was going to be boring...Lleyton Hewitt and the sweet-natured Kim Clijsters have suddenly ended their relationship. The pair had planned to marry in February. "Kim Clijsters and Lleyton Hewitt have jointly decided to put an end to their relationship for private reasons," Clijsters said on her official website. "Both of us distance ourselves from the malicious gossip which inevitably surfaces in this kind of situation."...According to Mosnews.com, you could soon be seeing Yevgeny Kafelnikov on ESPN's World Series of Poker. The Y-Man recently won the Moscow Open poker tournament, collecting $10G, outlasting a field of 52...According to Brit pub The Sunday Telegraph, Paris Hilton has boasted that she is having a relationship with Mark Philippoussis: "I've got a new man and I'm head over heels in love. I adore him, he's so hot. His name is Mark Philippoussis."...The Australian, which our Aussie friends tell us is not a tabloid but a respected publication, also dropped the bomb that Paris Hilton was seen "locking lips" last weekend with Andy Roddick, with Paris declining to discuss her current relationship status, only saying she was "Happy, so happy," and "tired of the Hollywood guys. I want a normal nice boy. I want someone, like, 30 (years old), not, like, 50. And I'm so happy I don't really care if people want to say rude things."...Former No. 2 and French Open runner-up Magnus Norman has announced his retirement, with the Swede unable to make a comeback after multiple hip surgeries and knee injuries. Norman won five titles in both 1999 and 2000, and weathered dating Martina Hingis for a time.

NOVEMBER

Chances of Andre Agassi showing up in Houston if he qualifies in the No. 9 spot at the alternate? Sitting around for a week listening to Mattress Mac? Zero?...Staples Center proprietor Philip Anschutz reportedly is interested in "founding a fifth Grand Slam," to be played at the Home Depot Center in Carson, California? As tournament organizers in Beijing have shown, that's code for "Don't know much about tennis but we have a lot of cash."... Who puts out press releases calling their own marketing campaigns "edgy"? Why, the WTATour, of course! On Wednesday the WTA announced a billboard campaign based entirely on the looks of Russian Maria Sharapova, with the theme "Got Sharapova!" Could they have done better than to copy a milk campaign? Could the ATP earlier this year have done better than to base a campaign on Pat Benatar's bad '80s song "Hit Me With Your Best Shot?" Do the tours actually have marketing staff, or do they just randomly pick things out of magazines from the '80s? The WTA touts the "Russian beauty," then as an aside in the release mentions that, by the way, Lindsay Davenport, Amelie Mauresmo, and other Russians Anastasia Myskina, Elena Dementieva, and the apparently unmarketable Svetlana Kuznetsova will also be there. The media release for the "edgy" campaign, which doesn't explain where the edginess will come from, states the effort will include print ads in various Southern California publications, billboards throughout the L.A. area, and radio and TV spots...Mark Philippoussis on the media linking him romantically to Paris Hilton: "It's untrue, we're friends and that all we have been," Flipper told SMH. "I can't tell you how many girls I've 'dated' whom I've never met or only saw once. But that's how it's going to be. I can chance it, but my friends know the truth and that's the most important thing. I hope the public is smarter than to believe everything they read."...Go to the WTA Tour website, and get a load of the "Two Spots Left!" graphic for their WTA Championship section (as of Saturday night). FYI: The final eight was decided two days ago. Time to hire a web person...The WTA has spread billboards of a leggy short-skirted Maria Sharapova all over L.A. in promoting the WTA Championships with the caption "The closer you sit, the hotter she gets." You can't beat tennis porn. Serena Williams says she is all for it: "I love her legs in this picture. Her legs are so sexy. She is not being sold in this picture. This is a hot picture. If you're not ready to sell pictures, then you shouldn't be part of the tournament. Unfortunately, I hate to say it, but sex sells."...In case you've been worrying that Serena Williams' ego has taken a beating in 2004, barely qualifying for the year-end championships and missing out on the race for No. 1, worry not, that 300 lb. gorilla remains intact: "It doesn't matter that I have no real shot at No. 1 because I feel like I have less pressure and it really doesn't matter. It's OK. It's like Tiger (Woods). It's weird when Tiger loses. It's kind of weird when I lose. It's definitely bigger news for me to lose. I make people's careers."...WTA Championships organizers said the event lost money last year, will lose money again this year, and they think they will have the event through at least 2006. Where can we invest in your business model?...According to USA Today, "The WTA will require the Top 50 players to sign agreements at the start of the 2005 season to play in specific tournaments that will be tied to the tour's $4 million bonus pool. If they don't play, they don't earn the bonus." About time. Now the ATP needs to figure out where they can find some scratch to re-institute their bonus pool to get their players to stop playing big-guarantee smaller events and exos, and blowing off the Masters Series events...While Serena Williams fashion designs (and taste) have been roundly pounded by critics, the American has critiqued herself, and the results are in: "I'm an unbelievable designer. I don't know how I know and just do these things. I just start sketching and then I just know the colors and I always know the forecast. I know green and purple are going to be hot. I was born to be a designer. I worked hard to be a tennis player, I don't work hard to be a designer."...Lou Tilley writing for the Main Line Times about Maria Sharapova's semifinal pull-out last week at Philadelphia: "What we knew was this: Sharapova told the driver of her complimentary Porsche at 4:30 p.m. the previous afternoon, to be at her hotel at 5 p.m., as she was catching a plane to Los Angeles. He asked her why, since she had just won her quarterfinal match, and was to play on versus (Amelie) Mauresmo, and maybe get into the finals -- and a shot at the top prize of 93 grand. She reportedly said, "Well, I have gotten my work in for the week, made a nice check and now I can go to L.A., and rest up for a while before the big season ending event.""...So Andre Agassi will not show up as the alternate for the Masters Cup, to be replaced by Guillermo Canas. What a shocker, we didn't see that coming -- can't picture last year's finalist not wanting to sit for a week watching Gaston Gaudio struggle on the hardcourts while sitting next to tournament promoter Jim "Mattress Mac" McIngvale and hearing about the virtues of four more years of the George W. Bush administration...U.S. Davis Cup captain Patrick McEnroe on inexplicably putting Mardy "Silver" Fish, a net player with a shaky back-court game, on the red clay against Spain over baseline grinder Vince Spadea: "I believe Mardy has the best chance to win the match, based on his ability, based on his experience playing Davis Cup, based on the fact he's played well in the Olympics, he's played well in some big, big matches for us," McEnroe told Tennis Week. "I still believe Mardy's got a tremendous upside as far as his career goes. And I think he's got a lot of game. I don't think he's lived up to his potential yet."...Brickbats to ESPN for not following up on what their camera was reporting after the wild Serena Williams-Maria Sharapova final at the WTA Championships. Maria's dad Yuri runs on the court afterwards for the congratulatory hug, then does some joyful running around accompanied by maniacal arm-windmilling ala Pete Townsend, but then seconds later the ESPN cameras show the dad angrily mouthing f-bombs to someone else in the crowd and being restrained by his posse. Hey Cliff and Pam and Mary Joe, way to pretend that didn't happen. Also among the highlights was someone from the crowd bum-rushing the on-court trophy presentation, much to the entertainment of Serena who was doubled-over with laughter at the WTA staff's inability to stop the intruder...After failing to talk Amelie Mauresmo into playing the Fed Cup semifinals, French captain Guy Forget ripped her in the sports daily L'Equipe: "I can't believe she did this...Until the last minute I tried to make her change her mind but the answer was negative...What frustrates me is that the Fed Cup is no longer a target for her. I'm not interested in leading a squad of players who turn up when they feel like it." Is the Fed Cup a target for any of the top players besides Russia, who have 10 or so players to choose from?... is 20-0 against Top 10 opponents going back to last year's Tennis Masters Cup and 12-0 in finals going back to last year...Roger FedererAndy Roddick on the upcoming Davis Cup meeting with Spain on the red dirt: "It's going to be crazy. We expect that. The good thing is we know what we're getting into when we go over there. It's not going to be a surprise. We know it's going to be tough. But we go in with the mindset that we just have to try our best to deal with it. We're excited. We feel with the group of guys we've been building for three or four years, to have a chance at the title now, it's very exciting."...The USTA has extended Patrick McEnroe's U.S. Davis Cup captain's contract through 2006...Jim "Mattress Mac" McIngvale has bought a World Team Tennis franchise, signing Steffi Graf for 2005, and is reportedly trying to finagle a Masters Series event for Argentina?...Mark Philippoussis will reportedly return to New York and seek some more help from John McEnroe before beginning his 2005 campaign...Russia Fed Cup coach Larisa Neiland tells Reuters that Maria Sharapova would be a tough fit for the Russian team: "I don't think she'll find it easy being on the same team with all the rest of our girls. Maria's main problem is her father and I just don't see how he would coexist with other girls' parents and team officials. You can't just go by rankings alone in selecting the team. You need great team spirit, togetherness in order to make a really strong squad. Every time Maria was playing a Russian girl (at the WTA Championships), her father's behavior was simply outrageous, nasty and out of control. He basically tells everyone 'to get lost'. I just don't see how he could work with the rest of us."...Monica Seles says she will wait until next year to make a retirement decision: "By January, I will make a decision," Seles told the Sarasota Herald-Tribune. "If I can't play then I probably will (retire). But not until January. I am trying to get ready to play this year. I don't want to talk about it because I am still trying so hard. I am not going into it with that frame of mind. I am trying to stay in a positive frame of mind. I have been feeling good. I have been hitting in the morning and then in the afternoon about three times a week. It (the foot) is feeling better."...Roger Federer wins the Masters Cup...Anastasia Myskina leads Russia to the Fed Cup over France.

DECEMBER

Martina Hingis will play the WTA Volvo Women's Open in Pattaya, Thailand on Jan. 31, 2005 to raise money for several Thai charities that help women and children who have suffered from abuse, homelessness and illness. "I hope to raise awareness of the support needed for those who are less fortunate and living in impoverished conditions in Thailand and around the world," she said Tuesday in a statement. Sources say she is not planning on playing any other events (unless of course she does well and the ego kicks in) in her first return to the WTA Tour in more than two years...Speaking to the French newspaper L'Equipe on Wednesday, Pete Sampras played down a return to competitive tennis, saying he has made his cash and enjoys sleeping in: "I'm not at all disappointed about what the sport did for my finances and my name. But I was tired of tennis and it consumed me. I spent so many years getting to the top and then keeping my place as No. 1, and it was very stressful. Throughout my career, I never had one perfectly good night's sleep. When it was all over, I started to sleep fine without any concerns in my head, as I didn't have to think about catching a plane or playing a really hard match the following day. I am still calming things down, and that is why I'm not playing any professional tennis."...Gustavo Kuerten is targeting March, right before the claycourt season, for his return from hip surgery...Tennis Australia, under the spotlight for blowing money and not producing much (any?) young talent, has so far said 'no thanks' to an offer by resident blowhard Pat Cash for help: "I have offered my help but, as yet, have not been invited," Cash told FOX Sports Australia. "Oh well, it seems that arrogance and an old boys network at the top level are only slowing the progress down even further. Perhaps they don't like my candidness?" Or the thought of putting an a-hole in a top management position?...Sun Tian Tian and Li Ting, winners of the women's doubles gold in Athens: "Now we have got used to the way international opponents play tennis," Tian Tian said. "For example we didn't know how fast the ball went."...Amelie Mauresmo says she has no regret blowing off the Fed Cup, even after watching France lose in the final: "I came back from vacation on Sunday and I saw the last two matches on television. I don't regret at all not going to Moscow because I took my decision for sporting reasons. I discussed my reasons with (captain) Guy Forget but that will stay between him and me."...Hey ESPN, thanks for buying the Davis Cup rights so you can show SportsCenter re-runs while the Davis Cup matches are being played live. Just give up on tennis and sell your rights to The Tennis Channel...The Guardian from Seville: "(Patrick) McEnroe has obstinately stuck by (Mardy) Fish, who will play the opening singles this morning against Spain's No. 1 Carlos Moya, the 1998 French Open champion. Fish, ranked No. 37 in the world, has apparently not won one practice set since the Americans arrived here and lost the only competitive match he played on clay this year...Independent observers believe that by ignoring (Vince) Spadea the U.S. captain has made a significant error." By "independent observers" you mean inhabitants of the planet Earth?...Crown Prince Felipe was among the 27,000+ fans Sunday who piled into Seville's Estadio Olimpico to see their Spanish team finish off the United States in Davis Cup...Jim Courier defeated Thomas Muster 7-6(4), 6-4, to win the Senior Masters title in London's Albert Hall.

MORE DECEMBER TENNIS-X NEWS, NOTES, QUOTES AND BARBS

Maria Sharapova on the difficulties of being the 17-year-old future of women's tennis: "One day I can be with my friend talking about the girliest, weird things and the next day I'm in a meeting talking about a deal or sponsorship or doing a photo shoot that are run by all adults that want my opinion," she told The Associated Press. "I make the transition quite well. I always thought I'm more mature than other kids my age, but that's because of the sport I play and the business I'm in. If you're not mature, I don't know how you can accomplish what you do...I'm such a girly girl. I love being stylish and elegant because on court it's mentally and physically draining. You give it all you've got, you don't show your pretty side."...Most brutal headline award from National Nine News in Australia on the Anna Kournikova-Enrique Iglesias coupling: "Tennis failure nets Latin hearthrob"...Justine Henin-Hardenne lost an exhibition match to Nathalie Dechy 6-2, 7-5 on Saturday, then a three-setter to Elena Dementieva the next day...Scott Draper earned his Australasian PGA Tour players' card and plans to play pro golf and tennis in 2005: "I still love tennis but it's frustrating when your body won't do what you want it to do. I'll give them both a try and if I have to give one the flick it will probably be the tennis."...Justine Henin-Hardenne on heading into the Australian Open after her illness-ridden year in 2004: "I will be heading to Australia with a lot of question marks over me. I know that," she told AFP. "But I think there will be less pressure on me than last year, even if I am the defending champion. Above all, it will be the first games back that matter most. They will be very important for me. Physically, it's obvious that I hit rock bottom. Since April with the exception of the Olympics, I have not done much. All the successes I had prior to that was mainly due to the work I put in on building up my fitness. Now it's time to get back to putting in 200 per cent effort and I think I am capable of doing that. I don't have to prove myself to anyone now. I just want to go out and enjoy myself."...Jennifer Capriati missed the Aussie Open last year with a back injury, and now a question mark for 2005 with the shoulder injury...Roger Federer was turned down by Tony Roche for a coaching stint for 2005...Andy Roddick will have his own calendar on the market starting in 2006: "Andy is hands down the hottest male player on the tennis courts today," said John Turner, President of John F. Turner and Company. "We are thrilled to have formed this relationship with him and have only the highest of expectations for his calendar." Andy says 'Show me the cash': "I grew up with calendars of my favorite athletes on my wall, so I am very excited about this opportunity to actually have my own calendar," Roddick said. "John F. Turner and Company has a very impressive record of creating an innovative look for all of their calendar products, and I am looking forward to working with them to create something that I will be proud of."...Marcelo Rios is playing a series of "farewell exhibitions" in December, recently with a win over Goran Ivanisevic...Ever get the feeling that Brad Gilbert would sign up to coach Tatiana Golovin if it didn't mean hanging out constantly at women's tournaments having no one to talk about sports with?...The WTA Auckland event for January 2005 is struggling, with No. 26 Amy "Joltin' Joe" Frazier as the current top seed -- time to flash more cash...Still no decision in the battle whether Anna is married to Enrique Iglecias or not, with Anna saying yes, but investigators in the media saying no. Anna's publicist wont even touch this one: "We never comment on our clients' personal lives," said her rep Ivy "John Cougar" Mollenkamp. Media outlets have done some digging but failed to come up with a marriage licence. "Anna has a complicated relationship with the subject of marriage," said Us Weekly editor Janice Min. "They do enjoy the cat-and-mouse guessing game they put the media through."...Austrian Stefan Koubek has been handed a three-month ban by the International Tennis Federation (ITF) after testing positive for a banned substance, failing a drug test at the 2004 French Open. Koubek says he will appeal, and blames it on an injection given to him by a doctor for a wrist injury. "I have acted correctly," the 27-year-old Koubek said in a statement. "A three-month ban would mean that I not only will miss the Australian Open but also the Davis Cup in Australia."...Maria Sharapova will be restricted to just one Australian summer circuit appearance -- the Australian Open -- because of age eligibility restrictions...Venus and Serena Williams are both planning on playing the Australian Open, but have reportedly not entered any pre-Aussie WTA events or exhibitions...The ATP event in Sydney has a new sponsor and has been renamed the Medibank International...Lleyton Hewitt will skip the Hopman Cup exhibition, with his lead-up to the Aussie Open consisting of ATP events in Adelaide and Sydney... Pat Rafter will do commentary for FOX Sports during the Australian Open. Others on the FOX team are Wally Masur, Sandon Stolle, Rachel McQuillan, Josh Eagle, Peter Tramacchi and Liz Smylie. Americans, suffer on as you read of FOX's television viewer options in Australia: "Available to FOXTEL Digital and AUSTAR Digital subscribers, the FOX SPORTS Active Tennis application will put viewers in control like never before, and will be available throughout the Australian Open. Some of the features will include a choice of different live matches, different audio, news and views from press conferences, player interviews, player bios, draws, the latest news, plus a wide range of live and historical statistics." Contrast that to ESPN in the U.S. sticking you with every Jennifer Capriati match...For you Northerners waiting for the thaw: http://www.dailytimes.com.pk/default.asp?page=story_23-12-2004_pg9_11...How great is 2005 going to be from a wacky dad perspective? You've got Yuri and Maria with the Newcomer of the Year Award, Damir back with Jelena, Jennifer with Stefano always near, Richard Williams lurking for a strike -- bring it on...Former No. 1 Marcelo Rios ended his career officially in December with a straight-set exhibition win over Guillermo Coria...Lance Armstrong won the Associated Press' Male Athlete of the Year award for the third year in a row; a tennis player has not won since John McEnroe in 1981...According to the AP, "Madras' sports officials were unsure about the fate the Chennai Open tennis tournament, which is among the year-launching competitions of the elite ATP Tour beginning January 3" due to the tsunami destruction...Anna Kournikova is still suing mom and dad Alla and Sergei over who owns their Miami home.

Those Were The Days II - 2004 Continued

APRIL

14-year-old Sesil "The Mouth" Karatancheva in an interview with Bulgaria's Sofia News Agency on her experience at Indian Wells: "Once they even mistook me for (Anna) Kournikova while I was doing my practice. I am okay with that, although the first time they compared me to her I thought, 'Am I really such a bad player?' Now I know what they mean is I'm just as pretty. This is a compliment, but really no big deal." The precocious youngster says she is close to signing a contract with Nike...Fabrice Santoro has made up with French Davis Cup captain Guy Forget and the French team, opening the door for representation after their April match against Switzerland. Forget had accused Santoro of creating tension on the team, but they all made nice after a meeting in Miami. "I had already spoken with Fabrice but this was the first time it went so well," Sebastien Grosjean said in L'Equipe. "He told us what he really thought."...Serena was thankful she didn't have to play her semifinal in Miami at night -- so she could watch TV: "I was nervous, I thought I was going to have to play tonight, but I didn't. I was going to watch 'The Apprentice,' that's my show. I'm a reality freak...I was really into 'Top Model.' I started out with 'The Bachelor' a few years ago here. And ever since then, I don't know, I just like, 'You're fired!' I've watched it since the first episode. I was like, 'Oh, wow, this is a good show.' I'm really into all the reality shows." Why is that Serena? "I don't know, just, I guess, because it's like you can really see the reality of things, how it's going. I mean, a lot of stuff is cut out, and you really -- can't really see it all. But I just think it's fab. It's not good for us actresses and stuff, it's tough, but I figure we can enjoy it while we can."...Serena wins the Miami event in her first tournament back after an eight-month injury lay-off...Martina Navratilova will also play singles at Charleston, following her singles appearance at Amelia Island: "I'm going to give it my best shot and just have fun. I'm playing singles to help my doubles. In singles you're covering every angle of the court. It'll help me get a better rhythm." Navratilova said she hopes to play singles at Eastbourne again on grass, and possibly at Wimbledon. "I'm going to take it week by week."...For the first time in the history of the WTA Rankings, three Russians rank in the Top 10 in Anastasia Myskina, Elena Dementieva, and Nadia Petrova...The lower-ranked WTA players are grumbling about the top seeds receiving byes at WTA events. When is the WTA going to wake up and initiate a bonus pool/penalty plan (or something) so they can get the top players to play the top events? First-round byes are the best incentive you can do?...Venus Williams has not won a title in her past eight tournaments, her longest streak since winning her first title in 1999...According to the Miami Herald's Edwin Pope, Serena Williams is not the horn-blowing ego maniac with the gem-studded "Serena" headbands and inappropriate tight-fitting ensembles, far removed from reality, but rather a humble, intellectual role model: "(Serena) Williams will go a long way to deny her gifts. Asked if she could identify with the old TV series Wonder Woman, she ducked the question. Such poise is among her many wonders. She seems totally bereft of any self-consciousness, or a single nervous mannerism."...Andre Agassi says that the current crop of young Americans can be such best buds because Andy Roddick is good, and the rest suck: "I came along in a generation where me, (Michael) Chang, (Jim) Courier, Pete (Sampras), we're fighting for No. 1 in the world. I think that got in the way of us having the fellowship that we really could have shared -- the enjoyment we could have shared."...The U.S., Belarus, France and Spain advance to the Davis Cup semifinals...Valencia is the return event for Juan Carlos Ferrero, who missed the Masters Series stops in Indian Wells and Miami with the smallpox...Argentina has filed an official protest after their Davis Cup loss to Belarus, saying the Taraflex indoor carpet surface was too fast - boo hoo, time to take your own medicine after putting countries on your watered-down red clay courts at home...Marat Safin has canned another coach, buddy Denis Golovanov...Justine Henin-Hardenne pulled from the Family Circle Cup, citing hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) causing lightheadedness, and will return to her home to Belgium for tests. H-H said she had been experiencing the symptoms for two weeks. "I have felt bad for two weeks now and that's enough," Henin-Hardenne said...Mark Philippoussis has not won a set in his eight matches since his fourth round Australian Open defeat in January...Belarus is the first nation to progress to the semifinals in their Davis Cup World Group debut...Justine Henin-Hardenne says she will skip the Fed Cup due to her dizzy spells, while Serena says she will skip it to prepare for the French Open, but others say differently. "Serena approached (Zina) Garrison and told her she was concerned about her knee, and that's why she withdrew," a tennis source familiar with the circumstances told The Associated Press on the condition of anonymity...Gustavo Kuerten is still standing by his Davis Cup boycott of Brazil after watching the Guga-less team lose to Paraguay: "It (the defeat) was concrete proof that these last seven or eight years have been wasted in terms of our tennis," Kuerten told Globo television on Wednesday. "I'm increasingly convinced that I want nothing to do with this administration. I hope there's a change as soon as possible so I can go back to competing."...Marat Safin will begin working with heart-attack-waiting-to-happen Peter Lundgren, former coach of Roger Federer, on a trial basis starting in Barcelona...The official diagnosis for Serena Williams is that she is not very bright, scheduling four events in a row after coming off knee surgery: "The official diagnosis by the doctor was that he was shocked I was playing this many tournaments in the beginning," Serena said. "He said normally when you're coming back from a procedure like me, you should play one week and then maybe take a week or two weeks off."...Just when you thought things were getting a little boring, here's John McEnroe firing off some salvos on the state of men's tennis: "As a result of Greg's (Rusedski) case the sport has come out even worse than before. It's as if the Three Stooges or Laurel and Hardy are running the ATP -- if it wasn't so serious it would be funny," McEnroe told the BBC. "Let's make some serious changes here and do something...This is a great sport in dispute with itself."...World No. 1 Roger Federer and Andre Agassi are skipping next week's Masters Series-Monte Carlo, with no penalty from the financially-challenged ATP, which seems to have given up on leveraging players with fines or a bonus pool to get them to play the top-tier Masters Series events. Welcome to the WTA's world...Kim Clijsters plays an exhibition match against Lleyton Hewitt with her wrist heavily taped but not wearing a brace, while still not playing WTA events -- not too smart, eh?...Venus Williams wins her first title in 14 months at Charleston...WTA spokesman Jim Fuhse, like WTA CEO Larry Scott in the past, says don't blame us for all the injuries: "It's not something that we take lightly. But I think if you look at the injuries that have happened this year, you'll see there's not a pattern."...Andy Roddick pulls from the Masters Series-Monte Carlo on the heels of playing five events in a row. Now the ATP needs to figure out how to get their top players to have allegiance to their Masters Series events rather than little tournaments like the Houston U.S. Claycourts. "He has informed the ATP that the reason for the pull-out is schedule incompatibility," said an ATP spokesman...The USTA will announce today that 10 summer U.S hardcourt tournaments will be packaged together as the US Open Series for TV this year and offer bonus money for players...Justine Henin-Hardenne has pulled from all her tournaments prior to the French Open...Turns out Rafael "The Prodigy" Nadal's foot is broken and he will miss the French, Wimbledon, and the Olympics, tough break for the kid with "Guaranteed Top 10" stamped on his forehead...The Guardian summing up the ATP's inability to get all its top players at its Masters Series events: "The Monte Carlo Open, or the Tennis Masters Series Monte Carlo as it is branded, is supposed to be one of the nine leading men's tournaments outside of the four grand slams. So, it might be assumed, all the leading players will be here. Indeed the ATP, the men's ruling body, considers entry to be mandatory. It is a joke. Prior to the tournament starting yesterday Andre Agassi, No. 5 in the world, had already made his excuses, which were no excuses at all...Roger Federer, the world No. 1, is also absent because he is apparently "fatigued," and yesterday came the news that Andy Roddick would not be arriving because of "schedule incompatibility." In other words, he could not be bothered to fly from Houston, Texas, where he lost the final of the U.S. Clay Court Championship on Sunday, to Europe. And what is the ATP going to do about it? Nothing."...That Andre Agassi will skip the ATP's top tier of Masters Series events in Monte Carlo, Hamburg and Rome, but play the tiny St. Poelten, Austrian event speaks to the renewed power of under-the-table guarantees paid to players during this time when the tour is struggling financially...Anna Kournikova is being sued by her parents, who say the tennis starlet has taken over the waterfront home the three jointly own...Apparently the formerly-retired Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario will play doubles at the tour stops beginning in May in Berlin, Rome, Roland Garros, and Wimbledon with Spanish countrywoman Anabel "Funky Cold" Medina Garrigues as tune-ups for the Athens Olympics...Masters Series-Monte Carlo Tournament Director Patrice Dominguez, speaking to the AFP on the US Open Series: "We don't want a tour inside the tour...We have enough problems having two rankings today (ATP Champions Race and Entry System), not to have a third one for six tournaments during the year. We want to have a global vision, not a regional tour...(ATP CEO Mark Miles) went to the negotiating table without telling us anything."...Former No. 1 Pat Rafter married his longtime girlfriend and underwear model Lara Feltham...Why is WTA CEO Larry Scott failing to push Wimbledon and the French Open for equal prize money? And why are the top players just sitting on their hands?...Tim Phillips, Wimbledon chairman, says the ladies need to avoid getting their panties in a knot over the prize money differential at Wimbledon, because equal prize money is just not going to happen: "We have not been persuaded. We are just trying to be fair to men and women. Don't forget, the ladies' prize pot is over four-and-a-half million dollars." Who says England isn't mired in the 19th century? As Cartman would say, "Now get back in that kitchen and bake me some pie!" Wait until Martina Navratilova hears of this, get ready to be ripped.

MAY

In a carefully-worded statement, we'll note that top Americans Andy Roddick, Andre Agassi and Mardy Fish have yet to set foot on the European red clay during the ATP pre-French claycourt swing, currently in its third week...Yevgeny Kafelnikov, still pretending he's not fat and could make a comeback at any moment, withdrew from the French open this week...Andy Roddick helped evacuate guests onto the roof of a blazing hotel Saturday at the Parco dei Principi, where three people died in the blaze. Around 30 players were staying at the hotel, and no players were injured. "Roddick helped people onto the roof," said Nicola Arzani, European communications director for the ATP. "Several of the players had a real fright. I talked to a few of them this morning, and I know that (Marat) Safin, his trainer and his girlfriend were quite shaken up." Two players, Filippo Volandri and Sjeng Schalken, were both evacuated from the hotel using firefighters' cranes. An American guest died after trying to lower himself to the street using a sheet, and an elderly Canadian couple also died...Justine Henin-Hardenne's camp says she will not play an event before the French Open while recovering from her viral infection...Kim Clijsters is playing again this week in Berlin but with a wrist brace: "I cannot put as much spin on my backhand as I want and that's a problem. I guess claycourt is not the best surface to come back on because you need a lot of spin but I have to be careful. I must not overuse my backhand."...Wheelchair tennis player Miles Thompson of the U.S. was suspended for three months by the International Tennis Federation on Tuesday after testing positive for cocaine. Way to skip the nandrolone and go straight for the blow...Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario is back on the doubles court this week in Berlin, practicing in a bid to become the first tennis player to take part in five Olympics: "It's a personal challenge and something I'm really looking forward to," the 32-year-old said. "I'm not planning a comeback on the tour. After the Olympics I will probably play a few exhibitions but that will be it."...Andy Roddick loses first round at the MS-Rome then pulls from the MS-Hamburg citing a knee injury...Kim Clijsters announced on her website she is pulling from the French open due to her injured wrist, and will rest up to then concentrate on the grasscourt season...American James Blake slammed into the net post during practice Thursday in Rome, sending him to the hospital with head and spine injuries that will sideline him two to five weeks...Lleyton Hewitt will apparently boycott the Masters Series-Rome tournament next year after what he considered poor scheduling, and with tournament officials giving his coach Roger Rasheed the brush-off after he made complaints...John McEnroe is at it again, throwing out some out-of-the-box ideas that actually make sense in making the men's game more exciting: "I don't see the sport of tennis using their older players in the way that golf does, for example. Arnold Palmer is 75 years old, or something like that, and he is still welcomed with open arms. You know, it's still 'Arnie is the greatest'. It's a tradition people like. And yet, if, God forbid, I went up there and said I'd like a wildcard at Wimbledon, the ATP would be up in arms because I'd be taking the spotlight away from the No. 115th guy in the world who could still get in by qualifying."...From South Africa's News24 on the top American exodus from Hamburg: "(Andre) Agassi and (Andy) Roddick have decided that the Northern seaport event, which starts on Monday, and which sometimes produces damp conditions, heavy balls and a gruelling week, is not the best preparation for Roland Garros. Agassi is competing only once on clay before the French Open -- surprisingly, at the modest event next week at St Poelten. However, that tournament is taking place in Austria's highest per-capita-income town, which suggests that the ageing legend may be receiving generous appearance money for his efforts." You think?...Lindsay Davenport is still in the U.S., and won't head to Europe and the red dirt until Strasbourg, the week prior to the French Open. "The French is not something I put a lot of emphasis on or think about," Davenport told Charlie "Brick" Bricker of the Florida Sun-Sentinel. "There's just something about Roland Garros. Some places I just walk in and love it. Not Roland Garros."...Goran Ivanisevic continues to suffer shoulder problems, losing in the first round of the Zagreb Challenger doubles, playing with a 15-year-old fellow Croat, saying his serve is now so weak that he would struggle to beat the Williams sisters. "My serve is not as good as it used to be. Other guys hit much harder...Now I am ideal for women's tennis. Serena, Venus and me -- what a fight that would be."...Marat Safin talking about going into the tank against Jurgen "Tuna" Melzer in Hamburg: "I didn't feel like playing today...I just didn't feel like being on the court. The hour they put me and all that together took over my motivation."...Now that the WTA has dropped the ball on the injury issue, with the rising tide it's not a matter of if they'll look into the injuries, but when. And when they do, look for a triumphant media release, something like "WTA Forms Independent Super Tribunal Commission Focus Group to Look Into Increased Injuries, That Incidentally Aren't Our Fault."...Guillermo Coria has won his last 30 matches on the dirt...The Guardian on the ATP and the US Open Series deal: "But certain European tournament directors were immediately up in arms. Not only had Mark Miles, the chief executive of the ATP, the men's ruling body, seemingly rubber-stamped the deal, it had also been done behind their backs. Here was yet another example, they argued, of the American-based ATP taking a unilateral decision for the benefit of Americans only."...Roger Federer wins the MS-Hamburg, ending Guillermo Coria's 31-match win streak on clay...World No. 1 Justine Henin-Hardenne says she has sufficiently recovered from the viral infection that has kept her out of action since April, and will defend her title at the French Open...Rapper Snoop Dogg was asked by Sports Illustrated which sport people would be surprised to know he liked: "Tennis. I used to like Ivan Lendl. He was sharp. An old schooler. Make it happen and roll out. Now I like Venus and Serena, but Ivan was the truth."...Serena Williams, who last year left the French Open in tears after being booed off the court: "The only thing I remember about last year is that I didn't win," she said, with an uncomfortable laugh. "I've been reading some articles about African-American history and a lot of worse things have happened. When I look at it like that, I'm spoiled." Umm, so you're an African-American groundbreaker because your haughty self got booed in France? You're right up there with Rosa Parks!...Despite back-to-back claycourt titles in Berlin and Rome, not many people seem to see Amelie Mauresmo winning the French, eh?...Serena Williams will debut her custom-designed Nike apparel collection on Saturday in Paris for the French Open -- hopefully she can one-up the heinous frilly "corset outfit" that was her last attempt. Nike to Serena: 'Try to, uh, design something that tennis players would actually want to, uh, wear.'...An emotional Andre Agassi welled up with tears while answering questions Monday after his shocking first-round exit to a No. 271-ranked qualifier at the French Open. "It's hard to say," said Agassi, his eyes welling up, asked whether he would return to Roland Garros in 2005 as a 35-year-old. "You want to come back, but you just don't know."...Coach Peter Lundgren says taking on Marat Safin has its own unique ups and downs: "His personality is very different to that of Roger's (Federer) but he's great. He listens to what I tell him. I really like him very much. Sometimes I wish he would be a bit more motivated."...Guillermo Coria says Andre Agassi avoided him on the practice courts after his experience last year: "Last year we had trained together, and before the draw I trained with him, and I realized that I could beat him. I found out about his weaknesses. This year he didn't want to repeat the experience. He wanted to wait for the draw."...Hey Amelie Mauresmo and Jennifer Capriati, before mouthing off to the press about Martina Navratilova "penalizing young French women players" by taking a wildcard at Roland Garros, how about pausing to think about the greater good of the sport, about the international audience tuning in to see the former No. 1 legend rather than some no-name French 14-year-old?...Jennifer Capriati on hiring Heinz Gunthardt, the former coach of Steffi Graf: "We really don't talk about things he did with her (Graf) because we're just two totally different players. I don't wake up at 6 in the morning to go practice, that's for sure." How about 3 in the morning hitting the 'fridge?...At 6 hours 33 minutes, the Arnaud Clement-Fabrice Santoro match is the longest ever played, beating out by two minutes the Vicki Nelson-Dunbar d. Jean Hepner clash at the Virginia Slims-Richmond in 1984 which went 6:31. The 71 games played was also the most in Roland Garros history...The difference between American and Canadian tennis -- from the Tennis Canada newsletter: "Sharon Fichman of Toronto made it to the quarterfinals at the Italian Junior Open. In a nail-biting three-set match, she came close to upsetting #14 seed Viktoria Azarenka, but came up just short, losing 6-4, 6-0." See, in American losing 6-0 means you got your ass kicked; in Canada, it means you almost upset someone. Also in America, a three-set match also has a three-set score...The 2004 French Open marks the first time in the Open Era there's been no American man in the third round of a Grand Slam...For the first time in French Open history, both defending champions are eliminated prior to the third round...Marat Safin, screaming after missing easy volley No. 58 against Felix Mantilla in the fifth set at the French: "So burned out! So fucking burned out!"...Marat also had a hard time understanding getting a penalty point for pulling his pants down on court: "Nobody complained. Everybody was okay. It wasn't like really bad. But I don't understand why. The people like the chair umpire, the supervisor on the court, they should to come and they should destroy this just to show that they are there. Really, they have no clue about tennis."...With the inevitable announcement that the ATP will be moving the year-ending Masters Cup to Shanghai (China, that is), Masters Cup-Houston organizer Jim "Mattress Mac" McIngvale couldn't contain himself any longer, and finally cut loose on ATP CEO Mark Miles: "I don't mind telling the truth about the guy -- he's worthless," McIngvale told the Houston Chronicle. "Mark Miles has done nothing for tennis. All he wants to do is propagate his $700,000-a-year salary and keep flying first-class tickets all over the world. I don't think he's good for the game at all...We had no relations last year so it couldn't be any worse. The guy never called me, not one time all year until he showed up (at the Masters Cup). Then all he wanted to do was whine about how we hadn't spent enough money to entertain their clients. Sure, Mercedes spends a lot of money, but it all goes to the ATP."

June

Tuesday at Roland Garros was the first time that both Williams sisters have lost at a tournament on the same day...Serena Williams' loss to Jennifer Capriati in the French Open quarterfinals means she will drop to No. 11 when the new WTA rankings come out next week. It is her first slide out of the Top 10 since August 1999...Tim Henman is the first Brit to reach the French Open semifinals since the Open Era began in 1968...Anastasia Myskina-Elena Dementieva will play in the first Russian final in Slam history at the French, while Gaston Gaudio-Guillermo Coria will contest the first all-Argentine Roland Garros final...ESPN commentator Mary Carillo: "Fitness is huge, and I wish the women's game had a higher fitness level."...Anastasia Myskina showed up at Roland Garros this year with a 1-4 career record...From the Washington Post: "But speaking to reporters afterward, (Elena) Dementieva evoked empathy as she tried to explain her poor performance and the serve she couldn't control. She was no longer the professional athlete who couldn't get a basic skill right. With her visor off and long, blond hair draping her shoulders, she seemed more like a teenager who, try as she might, couldn't learn to parallel park. "I don't know how to serve," she finally conceded, as her eyes welled with tears."...Asked what it might be like to struggle with serving the way Elena Dementieva did in the French Open final, Martina Hingis smiled, then said: "Ask Anna Kournikova, I don't know." Ouch!...With two match points, the 2-0 set lead, the cramps and his failure to put the match away, it's pretty safe to say that Guillermo Coria choked away the French Open: "I became nervous. It was new for me," Coria said. "I had the experience of other tournaments, of other matches, but I couldn't control this nervousness at that moment. I hope that I will be able to work a bit more on that...I was thinking about the victory. It seemed very close, a couple of games to achieve my dream. Maybe that was against me."...Gustavo Kuerten has pulled from Wimbledon with his hip injury...Andre Agassi is looking at a fat fine for failing to show at his post-match press conference after the embarrassing grasscourt loss to lawn-rookie Igor Andreev at Queen's...Boris Becker says Tim Henman has no shot at winning Wimbledon: "He's not the No. 1 player in the world but he plays above his level every year when Wimbledon comes. On his very, very best day, he's going to reach the semifinal."...Matt Cronin of tennisreporters.net questions the selection of Shanghai as the new host of the Masters Cup: "Should the above-mentioned tennis leaders, all of whom hail from democracies, be auctioning off a prestigious tournament to a non-democracy? Is North Korea next?"...Kim Clijsters underwent surgery on her left wrist effectively ending her hopes of playing this summer. The Belgian is hoping to return in late September...Andre Agassi has pulled from Wimbledon citing a bad hip...Estranged father Damir Dokic says he is ready to proceed with an intervention against his daughter, apparently in response to her losing ways: "I want the WTA to ask for additional psychiatric and doping tests for my daughter to confirm whether she uses illegal substances," Damir told The Telegraph. "I will approach her in a civilized way. If she won't listen, I predict it will be the end of her career."...Amelie Mauresmo says she is ready to put her French Open choke behind her and find some success on the grass: "I think I'm capable of volleying pretty well so I have a lot of hope for the next few weeks."...Jennifer Capriati and Heinz Gunthardt are no more...There has been a Williams sister in the Wimbledon final over the last four years...Martina Navratilova is the defending mixed doubles champ at Wimbledon...An American woman has won Wimbledon the last five years...Serena on her budding acting career: "Everyone says I'm a natural actress, but I need to be more expressive with my eyes. You have to use every facial thing you can muster up in emotional roles. Crying -- it's difficult. I can, though." We've seen some good acting in post-match conferences...Amanda Coetzer announced her retirement from tennis on Friday...Former No. 1 Mats Wilander says the Andy Roddick-Brad Gilbert pairing has run its course: "Andy Roddick, he's gotten a lot of help from Brad Gilbert," Wilander said at Davis Cup in April. "But at the same time, I'm not sure he's doing anything for him anymore. What he taught Roddick didn't take too long -- it's just that somebody told him...I'm not sure he's developing his game anymore."...John McEnroe is once again calling out the Williams sisters for a head-to-head: "I believe I could beat them playing them either individually or at the same time. In fact it would probably be easier playing them together because they would confuse each other."...Goran Ivanisevic says he's ever harder to beat at this Wimbledon because he doesn't give a rat: "If I play well, nobody's going to beat me easy, especially since I don't have any goals. I'm retiring after this Wimbledon. I'm going to enjoy myself every minute on the court. If somebody wants to beat me, he's going to have to play really good tennis."...Marat Safin's foul mood after getting spanked by a young Russian Tuesday extended to his opinion of tennis at the Olympics: "Tennis doesn't need the Olympic Games. We have four grand slams. We have (the Masters Series). We have a lot of tournaments. We have a pretty tough schedule. And now we are going to have the Olympics. I have to (go). But it is not my goal in life to win the Olympic Games."...Former Soviet Wimbledon finalist Alex Metreveli on Marat Safin's Wimbledon effort: "He was playing like he was doing everyone a big favor by being here. He was acting as if he played here every day, it was just ordinary for him. It was totally unprofessional on his part."...On the "Weakest Link", Andy Roddick had no answer when Anne Robinson queried the American star on who what former tennis player was nicknamed "Fraulein Forehand" was. Nice sense of history, Andy...So what happened at the end of the Karolina "The Spreminator" Sprem-Venus Williams match? At 1-2, with The Spreminator serving in the second set tiebreak, chair ump Ted Watts announces 2-2 after a service fault. Sprem proceeded to hit a second serve which Venus pounded down the line for a winner. Watts then called 3-2 Venus. Both players looked a bit confused, but neither queried. Venus wins the next point for 4-2 (really 4-1) and then they cautiously switched sides. Once that happened, both players basically acknowledged it was too late to turn back...For the first time in the 14-year history of the ATP Tour, no American has been elected to the 12-member Players Council. And CEO Mark Miles' contract ends in 2005. And the ATP's headquarters in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida, has been on the skids for a long while. Do the math...Writes the Glasgow Sunday Herald: "John McEnroe, never a man to mince his words, offered a cutting critique on the ATP amid their recent drugs scandal. 'It is as if the Three Stooges or Laurel and Hardy are running the ATP. If it wasn't so serious, it would be funny.' Financial meltdown followed by threats of player revolts, suspicions over betting patterns and a doping fiasco, the last few years have seen so many self-inflicted wounds it is amazing the governing body of the men's game hasn't bled to death.'"...Michael Stich on the decline of Wimbledon: "Let's take a guy like Carlos Moya, who I like and respect. He refused to come to Wimbledon early in his career but now he is here because he believes the surface and the balls are set up for him to do well, maybe not to win the championship but to get through a few matches. It is good for the game that those guys are here, but not good for the game that they are only here because the surface has changed."...Greg Rusedski brought the hammer down about not getting support during his drug case from certain individuals: "Some people -- including players -- said I made a mistake in going public about my test, but I had no choice. It was starting to leak out. Two of those players who criticized me were Todd Martin and Todd Woodbridge. They didn't even read the facts about the situation or the press statement."...Serena on her acting ability: "Well, I'm real dramatic, as well. I just have a good scream, but I'm also really funny and have a great personality on the camera and also have a really good laugh. At any given moment, I can just laugh. It doesn't matter." As Jon Lovitz used to say, "Acting!"...Iva Majoli, who beat Martina Hingis in the 1997 French Open final, is quitting tennis at 26 after getting out of shape and plunging in the rankings: "It's over. I will not play tennis any more. Maybe I will play some exhibition or doubles but my career is over. I realized that I fell too low. I am practically at the beginning and I would have to work like a maniac to get back to the top. I am not ready to do that." Nice work ethic.


Wow. Talk about the more things change...