Those Were The Days II - 2004 Continued

APRIL

14-year-old Sesil "The Mouth" Karatancheva in an interview with Bulgaria's Sofia News Agency on her experience at Indian Wells: "Once they even mistook me for (Anna) Kournikova while I was doing my practice. I am okay with that, although the first time they compared me to her I thought, 'Am I really such a bad player?' Now I know what they mean is I'm just as pretty. This is a compliment, but really no big deal." The precocious youngster says she is close to signing a contract with Nike...Fabrice Santoro has made up with French Davis Cup captain Guy Forget and the French team, opening the door for representation after their April match against Switzerland. Forget had accused Santoro of creating tension on the team, but they all made nice after a meeting in Miami. "I had already spoken with Fabrice but this was the first time it went so well," Sebastien Grosjean said in L'Equipe. "He told us what he really thought."...Serena was thankful she didn't have to play her semifinal in Miami at night -- so she could watch TV: "I was nervous, I thought I was going to have to play tonight, but I didn't. I was going to watch 'The Apprentice,' that's my show. I'm a reality freak...I was really into 'Top Model.' I started out with 'The Bachelor' a few years ago here. And ever since then, I don't know, I just like, 'You're fired!' I've watched it since the first episode. I was like, 'Oh, wow, this is a good show.' I'm really into all the reality shows." Why is that Serena? "I don't know, just, I guess, because it's like you can really see the reality of things, how it's going. I mean, a lot of stuff is cut out, and you really -- can't really see it all. But I just think it's fab. It's not good for us actresses and stuff, it's tough, but I figure we can enjoy it while we can."...Serena wins the Miami event in her first tournament back after an eight-month injury lay-off...Martina Navratilova will also play singles at Charleston, following her singles appearance at Amelia Island: "I'm going to give it my best shot and just have fun. I'm playing singles to help my doubles. In singles you're covering every angle of the court. It'll help me get a better rhythm." Navratilova said she hopes to play singles at Eastbourne again on grass, and possibly at Wimbledon. "I'm going to take it week by week."...For the first time in the history of the WTA Rankings, three Russians rank in the Top 10 in Anastasia Myskina, Elena Dementieva, and Nadia Petrova...The lower-ranked WTA players are grumbling about the top seeds receiving byes at WTA events. When is the WTA going to wake up and initiate a bonus pool/penalty plan (or something) so they can get the top players to play the top events? First-round byes are the best incentive you can do?...Venus Williams has not won a title in her past eight tournaments, her longest streak since winning her first title in 1999...According to the Miami Herald's Edwin Pope, Serena Williams is not the horn-blowing ego maniac with the gem-studded "Serena" headbands and inappropriate tight-fitting ensembles, far removed from reality, but rather a humble, intellectual role model: "(Serena) Williams will go a long way to deny her gifts. Asked if she could identify with the old TV series Wonder Woman, she ducked the question. Such poise is among her many wonders. She seems totally bereft of any self-consciousness, or a single nervous mannerism."...Andre Agassi says that the current crop of young Americans can be such best buds because Andy Roddick is good, and the rest suck: "I came along in a generation where me, (Michael) Chang, (Jim) Courier, Pete (Sampras), we're fighting for No. 1 in the world. I think that got in the way of us having the fellowship that we really could have shared -- the enjoyment we could have shared."...The U.S., Belarus, France and Spain advance to the Davis Cup semifinals...Valencia is the return event for Juan Carlos Ferrero, who missed the Masters Series stops in Indian Wells and Miami with the smallpox...Argentina has filed an official protest after their Davis Cup loss to Belarus, saying the Taraflex indoor carpet surface was too fast - boo hoo, time to take your own medicine after putting countries on your watered-down red clay courts at home...Marat Safin has canned another coach, buddy Denis Golovanov...Justine Henin-Hardenne pulled from the Family Circle Cup, citing hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) causing lightheadedness, and will return to her home to Belgium for tests. H-H said she had been experiencing the symptoms for two weeks. "I have felt bad for two weeks now and that's enough," Henin-Hardenne said...Mark Philippoussis has not won a set in his eight matches since his fourth round Australian Open defeat in January...Belarus is the first nation to progress to the semifinals in their Davis Cup World Group debut...Justine Henin-Hardenne says she will skip the Fed Cup due to her dizzy spells, while Serena says she will skip it to prepare for the French Open, but others say differently. "Serena approached (Zina) Garrison and told her she was concerned about her knee, and that's why she withdrew," a tennis source familiar with the circumstances told The Associated Press on the condition of anonymity...Gustavo Kuerten is still standing by his Davis Cup boycott of Brazil after watching the Guga-less team lose to Paraguay: "It (the defeat) was concrete proof that these last seven or eight years have been wasted in terms of our tennis," Kuerten told Globo television on Wednesday. "I'm increasingly convinced that I want nothing to do with this administration. I hope there's a change as soon as possible so I can go back to competing."...Marat Safin will begin working with heart-attack-waiting-to-happen Peter Lundgren, former coach of Roger Federer, on a trial basis starting in Barcelona...The official diagnosis for Serena Williams is that she is not very bright, scheduling four events in a row after coming off knee surgery: "The official diagnosis by the doctor was that he was shocked I was playing this many tournaments in the beginning," Serena said. "He said normally when you're coming back from a procedure like me, you should play one week and then maybe take a week or two weeks off."...Just when you thought things were getting a little boring, here's John McEnroe firing off some salvos on the state of men's tennis: "As a result of Greg's (Rusedski) case the sport has come out even worse than before. It's as if the Three Stooges or Laurel and Hardy are running the ATP -- if it wasn't so serious it would be funny," McEnroe told the BBC. "Let's make some serious changes here and do something...This is a great sport in dispute with itself."...World No. 1 Roger Federer and Andre Agassi are skipping next week's Masters Series-Monte Carlo, with no penalty from the financially-challenged ATP, which seems to have given up on leveraging players with fines or a bonus pool to get them to play the top-tier Masters Series events. Welcome to the WTA's world...Kim Clijsters plays an exhibition match against Lleyton Hewitt with her wrist heavily taped but not wearing a brace, while still not playing WTA events -- not too smart, eh?...Venus Williams wins her first title in 14 months at Charleston...WTA spokesman Jim Fuhse, like WTA CEO Larry Scott in the past, says don't blame us for all the injuries: "It's not something that we take lightly. But I think if you look at the injuries that have happened this year, you'll see there's not a pattern."...Andy Roddick pulls from the Masters Series-Monte Carlo on the heels of playing five events in a row. Now the ATP needs to figure out how to get their top players to have allegiance to their Masters Series events rather than little tournaments like the Houston U.S. Claycourts. "He has informed the ATP that the reason for the pull-out is schedule incompatibility," said an ATP spokesman...The USTA will announce today that 10 summer U.S hardcourt tournaments will be packaged together as the US Open Series for TV this year and offer bonus money for players...Justine Henin-Hardenne has pulled from all her tournaments prior to the French Open...Turns out Rafael "The Prodigy" Nadal's foot is broken and he will miss the French, Wimbledon, and the Olympics, tough break for the kid with "Guaranteed Top 10" stamped on his forehead...The Guardian summing up the ATP's inability to get all its top players at its Masters Series events: "The Monte Carlo Open, or the Tennis Masters Series Monte Carlo as it is branded, is supposed to be one of the nine leading men's tournaments outside of the four grand slams. So, it might be assumed, all the leading players will be here. Indeed the ATP, the men's ruling body, considers entry to be mandatory. It is a joke. Prior to the tournament starting yesterday Andre Agassi, No. 5 in the world, had already made his excuses, which were no excuses at all...Roger Federer, the world No. 1, is also absent because he is apparently "fatigued," and yesterday came the news that Andy Roddick would not be arriving because of "schedule incompatibility." In other words, he could not be bothered to fly from Houston, Texas, where he lost the final of the U.S. Clay Court Championship on Sunday, to Europe. And what is the ATP going to do about it? Nothing."...That Andre Agassi will skip the ATP's top tier of Masters Series events in Monte Carlo, Hamburg and Rome, but play the tiny St. Poelten, Austrian event speaks to the renewed power of under-the-table guarantees paid to players during this time when the tour is struggling financially...Anna Kournikova is being sued by her parents, who say the tennis starlet has taken over the waterfront home the three jointly own...Apparently the formerly-retired Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario will play doubles at the tour stops beginning in May in Berlin, Rome, Roland Garros, and Wimbledon with Spanish countrywoman Anabel "Funky Cold" Medina Garrigues as tune-ups for the Athens Olympics...Masters Series-Monte Carlo Tournament Director Patrice Dominguez, speaking to the AFP on the US Open Series: "We don't want a tour inside the tour...We have enough problems having two rankings today (ATP Champions Race and Entry System), not to have a third one for six tournaments during the year. We want to have a global vision, not a regional tour...(ATP CEO Mark Miles) went to the negotiating table without telling us anything."...Former No. 1 Pat Rafter married his longtime girlfriend and underwear model Lara Feltham...Why is WTA CEO Larry Scott failing to push Wimbledon and the French Open for equal prize money? And why are the top players just sitting on their hands?...Tim Phillips, Wimbledon chairman, says the ladies need to avoid getting their panties in a knot over the prize money differential at Wimbledon, because equal prize money is just not going to happen: "We have not been persuaded. We are just trying to be fair to men and women. Don't forget, the ladies' prize pot is over four-and-a-half million dollars." Who says England isn't mired in the 19th century? As Cartman would say, "Now get back in that kitchen and bake me some pie!" Wait until Martina Navratilova hears of this, get ready to be ripped.

MAY

In a carefully-worded statement, we'll note that top Americans Andy Roddick, Andre Agassi and Mardy Fish have yet to set foot on the European red clay during the ATP pre-French claycourt swing, currently in its third week...Yevgeny Kafelnikov, still pretending he's not fat and could make a comeback at any moment, withdrew from the French open this week...Andy Roddick helped evacuate guests onto the roof of a blazing hotel Saturday at the Parco dei Principi, where three people died in the blaze. Around 30 players were staying at the hotel, and no players were injured. "Roddick helped people onto the roof," said Nicola Arzani, European communications director for the ATP. "Several of the players had a real fright. I talked to a few of them this morning, and I know that (Marat) Safin, his trainer and his girlfriend were quite shaken up." Two players, Filippo Volandri and Sjeng Schalken, were both evacuated from the hotel using firefighters' cranes. An American guest died after trying to lower himself to the street using a sheet, and an elderly Canadian couple also died...Justine Henin-Hardenne's camp says she will not play an event before the French Open while recovering from her viral infection...Kim Clijsters is playing again this week in Berlin but with a wrist brace: "I cannot put as much spin on my backhand as I want and that's a problem. I guess claycourt is not the best surface to come back on because you need a lot of spin but I have to be careful. I must not overuse my backhand."...Wheelchair tennis player Miles Thompson of the U.S. was suspended for three months by the International Tennis Federation on Tuesday after testing positive for cocaine. Way to skip the nandrolone and go straight for the blow...Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario is back on the doubles court this week in Berlin, practicing in a bid to become the first tennis player to take part in five Olympics: "It's a personal challenge and something I'm really looking forward to," the 32-year-old said. "I'm not planning a comeback on the tour. After the Olympics I will probably play a few exhibitions but that will be it."...Andy Roddick loses first round at the MS-Rome then pulls from the MS-Hamburg citing a knee injury...Kim Clijsters announced on her website she is pulling from the French open due to her injured wrist, and will rest up to then concentrate on the grasscourt season...American James Blake slammed into the net post during practice Thursday in Rome, sending him to the hospital with head and spine injuries that will sideline him two to five weeks...Lleyton Hewitt will apparently boycott the Masters Series-Rome tournament next year after what he considered poor scheduling, and with tournament officials giving his coach Roger Rasheed the brush-off after he made complaints...John McEnroe is at it again, throwing out some out-of-the-box ideas that actually make sense in making the men's game more exciting: "I don't see the sport of tennis using their older players in the way that golf does, for example. Arnold Palmer is 75 years old, or something like that, and he is still welcomed with open arms. You know, it's still 'Arnie is the greatest'. It's a tradition people like. And yet, if, God forbid, I went up there and said I'd like a wildcard at Wimbledon, the ATP would be up in arms because I'd be taking the spotlight away from the No. 115th guy in the world who could still get in by qualifying."...From South Africa's News24 on the top American exodus from Hamburg: "(Andre) Agassi and (Andy) Roddick have decided that the Northern seaport event, which starts on Monday, and which sometimes produces damp conditions, heavy balls and a gruelling week, is not the best preparation for Roland Garros. Agassi is competing only once on clay before the French Open -- surprisingly, at the modest event next week at St Poelten. However, that tournament is taking place in Austria's highest per-capita-income town, which suggests that the ageing legend may be receiving generous appearance money for his efforts." You think?...Lindsay Davenport is still in the U.S., and won't head to Europe and the red dirt until Strasbourg, the week prior to the French Open. "The French is not something I put a lot of emphasis on or think about," Davenport told Charlie "Brick" Bricker of the Florida Sun-Sentinel. "There's just something about Roland Garros. Some places I just walk in and love it. Not Roland Garros."...Goran Ivanisevic continues to suffer shoulder problems, losing in the first round of the Zagreb Challenger doubles, playing with a 15-year-old fellow Croat, saying his serve is now so weak that he would struggle to beat the Williams sisters. "My serve is not as good as it used to be. Other guys hit much harder...Now I am ideal for women's tennis. Serena, Venus and me -- what a fight that would be."...Marat Safin talking about going into the tank against Jurgen "Tuna" Melzer in Hamburg: "I didn't feel like playing today...I just didn't feel like being on the court. The hour they put me and all that together took over my motivation."...Now that the WTA has dropped the ball on the injury issue, with the rising tide it's not a matter of if they'll look into the injuries, but when. And when they do, look for a triumphant media release, something like "WTA Forms Independent Super Tribunal Commission Focus Group to Look Into Increased Injuries, That Incidentally Aren't Our Fault."...Guillermo Coria has won his last 30 matches on the dirt...The Guardian on the ATP and the US Open Series deal: "But certain European tournament directors were immediately up in arms. Not only had Mark Miles, the chief executive of the ATP, the men's ruling body, seemingly rubber-stamped the deal, it had also been done behind their backs. Here was yet another example, they argued, of the American-based ATP taking a unilateral decision for the benefit of Americans only."...Roger Federer wins the MS-Hamburg, ending Guillermo Coria's 31-match win streak on clay...World No. 1 Justine Henin-Hardenne says she has sufficiently recovered from the viral infection that has kept her out of action since April, and will defend her title at the French Open...Rapper Snoop Dogg was asked by Sports Illustrated which sport people would be surprised to know he liked: "Tennis. I used to like Ivan Lendl. He was sharp. An old schooler. Make it happen and roll out. Now I like Venus and Serena, but Ivan was the truth."...Serena Williams, who last year left the French Open in tears after being booed off the court: "The only thing I remember about last year is that I didn't win," she said, with an uncomfortable laugh. "I've been reading some articles about African-American history and a lot of worse things have happened. When I look at it like that, I'm spoiled." Umm, so you're an African-American groundbreaker because your haughty self got booed in France? You're right up there with Rosa Parks!...Despite back-to-back claycourt titles in Berlin and Rome, not many people seem to see Amelie Mauresmo winning the French, eh?...Serena Williams will debut her custom-designed Nike apparel collection on Saturday in Paris for the French Open -- hopefully she can one-up the heinous frilly "corset outfit" that was her last attempt. Nike to Serena: 'Try to, uh, design something that tennis players would actually want to, uh, wear.'...An emotional Andre Agassi welled up with tears while answering questions Monday after his shocking first-round exit to a No. 271-ranked qualifier at the French Open. "It's hard to say," said Agassi, his eyes welling up, asked whether he would return to Roland Garros in 2005 as a 35-year-old. "You want to come back, but you just don't know."...Coach Peter Lundgren says taking on Marat Safin has its own unique ups and downs: "His personality is very different to that of Roger's (Federer) but he's great. He listens to what I tell him. I really like him very much. Sometimes I wish he would be a bit more motivated."...Guillermo Coria says Andre Agassi avoided him on the practice courts after his experience last year: "Last year we had trained together, and before the draw I trained with him, and I realized that I could beat him. I found out about his weaknesses. This year he didn't want to repeat the experience. He wanted to wait for the draw."...Hey Amelie Mauresmo and Jennifer Capriati, before mouthing off to the press about Martina Navratilova "penalizing young French women players" by taking a wildcard at Roland Garros, how about pausing to think about the greater good of the sport, about the international audience tuning in to see the former No. 1 legend rather than some no-name French 14-year-old?...Jennifer Capriati on hiring Heinz Gunthardt, the former coach of Steffi Graf: "We really don't talk about things he did with her (Graf) because we're just two totally different players. I don't wake up at 6 in the morning to go practice, that's for sure." How about 3 in the morning hitting the 'fridge?...At 6 hours 33 minutes, the Arnaud Clement-Fabrice Santoro match is the longest ever played, beating out by two minutes the Vicki Nelson-Dunbar d. Jean Hepner clash at the Virginia Slims-Richmond in 1984 which went 6:31. The 71 games played was also the most in Roland Garros history...The difference between American and Canadian tennis -- from the Tennis Canada newsletter: "Sharon Fichman of Toronto made it to the quarterfinals at the Italian Junior Open. In a nail-biting three-set match, she came close to upsetting #14 seed Viktoria Azarenka, but came up just short, losing 6-4, 6-0." See, in American losing 6-0 means you got your ass kicked; in Canada, it means you almost upset someone. Also in America, a three-set match also has a three-set score...The 2004 French Open marks the first time in the Open Era there's been no American man in the third round of a Grand Slam...For the first time in French Open history, both defending champions are eliminated prior to the third round...Marat Safin, screaming after missing easy volley No. 58 against Felix Mantilla in the fifth set at the French: "So burned out! So fucking burned out!"...Marat also had a hard time understanding getting a penalty point for pulling his pants down on court: "Nobody complained. Everybody was okay. It wasn't like really bad. But I don't understand why. The people like the chair umpire, the supervisor on the court, they should to come and they should destroy this just to show that they are there. Really, they have no clue about tennis."...With the inevitable announcement that the ATP will be moving the year-ending Masters Cup to Shanghai (China, that is), Masters Cup-Houston organizer Jim "Mattress Mac" McIngvale couldn't contain himself any longer, and finally cut loose on ATP CEO Mark Miles: "I don't mind telling the truth about the guy -- he's worthless," McIngvale told the Houston Chronicle. "Mark Miles has done nothing for tennis. All he wants to do is propagate his $700,000-a-year salary and keep flying first-class tickets all over the world. I don't think he's good for the game at all...We had no relations last year so it couldn't be any worse. The guy never called me, not one time all year until he showed up (at the Masters Cup). Then all he wanted to do was whine about how we hadn't spent enough money to entertain their clients. Sure, Mercedes spends a lot of money, but it all goes to the ATP."

June

Tuesday at Roland Garros was the first time that both Williams sisters have lost at a tournament on the same day...Serena Williams' loss to Jennifer Capriati in the French Open quarterfinals means she will drop to No. 11 when the new WTA rankings come out next week. It is her first slide out of the Top 10 since August 1999...Tim Henman is the first Brit to reach the French Open semifinals since the Open Era began in 1968...Anastasia Myskina-Elena Dementieva will play in the first Russian final in Slam history at the French, while Gaston Gaudio-Guillermo Coria will contest the first all-Argentine Roland Garros final...ESPN commentator Mary Carillo: "Fitness is huge, and I wish the women's game had a higher fitness level."...Anastasia Myskina showed up at Roland Garros this year with a 1-4 career record...From the Washington Post: "But speaking to reporters afterward, (Elena) Dementieva evoked empathy as she tried to explain her poor performance and the serve she couldn't control. She was no longer the professional athlete who couldn't get a basic skill right. With her visor off and long, blond hair draping her shoulders, she seemed more like a teenager who, try as she might, couldn't learn to parallel park. "I don't know how to serve," she finally conceded, as her eyes welled with tears."...Asked what it might be like to struggle with serving the way Elena Dementieva did in the French Open final, Martina Hingis smiled, then said: "Ask Anna Kournikova, I don't know." Ouch!...With two match points, the 2-0 set lead, the cramps and his failure to put the match away, it's pretty safe to say that Guillermo Coria choked away the French Open: "I became nervous. It was new for me," Coria said. "I had the experience of other tournaments, of other matches, but I couldn't control this nervousness at that moment. I hope that I will be able to work a bit more on that...I was thinking about the victory. It seemed very close, a couple of games to achieve my dream. Maybe that was against me."...Gustavo Kuerten has pulled from Wimbledon with his hip injury...Andre Agassi is looking at a fat fine for failing to show at his post-match press conference after the embarrassing grasscourt loss to lawn-rookie Igor Andreev at Queen's...Boris Becker says Tim Henman has no shot at winning Wimbledon: "He's not the No. 1 player in the world but he plays above his level every year when Wimbledon comes. On his very, very best day, he's going to reach the semifinal."...Matt Cronin of tennisreporters.net questions the selection of Shanghai as the new host of the Masters Cup: "Should the above-mentioned tennis leaders, all of whom hail from democracies, be auctioning off a prestigious tournament to a non-democracy? Is North Korea next?"...Kim Clijsters underwent surgery on her left wrist effectively ending her hopes of playing this summer. The Belgian is hoping to return in late September...Andre Agassi has pulled from Wimbledon citing a bad hip...Estranged father Damir Dokic says he is ready to proceed with an intervention against his daughter, apparently in response to her losing ways: "I want the WTA to ask for additional psychiatric and doping tests for my daughter to confirm whether she uses illegal substances," Damir told The Telegraph. "I will approach her in a civilized way. If she won't listen, I predict it will be the end of her career."...Amelie Mauresmo says she is ready to put her French Open choke behind her and find some success on the grass: "I think I'm capable of volleying pretty well so I have a lot of hope for the next few weeks."...Jennifer Capriati and Heinz Gunthardt are no more...There has been a Williams sister in the Wimbledon final over the last four years...Martina Navratilova is the defending mixed doubles champ at Wimbledon...An American woman has won Wimbledon the last five years...Serena on her budding acting career: "Everyone says I'm a natural actress, but I need to be more expressive with my eyes. You have to use every facial thing you can muster up in emotional roles. Crying -- it's difficult. I can, though." We've seen some good acting in post-match conferences...Amanda Coetzer announced her retirement from tennis on Friday...Former No. 1 Mats Wilander says the Andy Roddick-Brad Gilbert pairing has run its course: "Andy Roddick, he's gotten a lot of help from Brad Gilbert," Wilander said at Davis Cup in April. "But at the same time, I'm not sure he's doing anything for him anymore. What he taught Roddick didn't take too long -- it's just that somebody told him...I'm not sure he's developing his game anymore."...John McEnroe is once again calling out the Williams sisters for a head-to-head: "I believe I could beat them playing them either individually or at the same time. In fact it would probably be easier playing them together because they would confuse each other."...Goran Ivanisevic says he's ever harder to beat at this Wimbledon because he doesn't give a rat: "If I play well, nobody's going to beat me easy, especially since I don't have any goals. I'm retiring after this Wimbledon. I'm going to enjoy myself every minute on the court. If somebody wants to beat me, he's going to have to play really good tennis."...Marat Safin's foul mood after getting spanked by a young Russian Tuesday extended to his opinion of tennis at the Olympics: "Tennis doesn't need the Olympic Games. We have four grand slams. We have (the Masters Series). We have a lot of tournaments. We have a pretty tough schedule. And now we are going to have the Olympics. I have to (go). But it is not my goal in life to win the Olympic Games."...Former Soviet Wimbledon finalist Alex Metreveli on Marat Safin's Wimbledon effort: "He was playing like he was doing everyone a big favor by being here. He was acting as if he played here every day, it was just ordinary for him. It was totally unprofessional on his part."...On the "Weakest Link", Andy Roddick had no answer when Anne Robinson queried the American star on who what former tennis player was nicknamed "Fraulein Forehand" was. Nice sense of history, Andy...So what happened at the end of the Karolina "The Spreminator" Sprem-Venus Williams match? At 1-2, with The Spreminator serving in the second set tiebreak, chair ump Ted Watts announces 2-2 after a service fault. Sprem proceeded to hit a second serve which Venus pounded down the line for a winner. Watts then called 3-2 Venus. Both players looked a bit confused, but neither queried. Venus wins the next point for 4-2 (really 4-1) and then they cautiously switched sides. Once that happened, both players basically acknowledged it was too late to turn back...For the first time in the 14-year history of the ATP Tour, no American has been elected to the 12-member Players Council. And CEO Mark Miles' contract ends in 2005. And the ATP's headquarters in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida, has been on the skids for a long while. Do the math...Writes the Glasgow Sunday Herald: "John McEnroe, never a man to mince his words, offered a cutting critique on the ATP amid their recent drugs scandal. 'It is as if the Three Stooges or Laurel and Hardy are running the ATP. If it wasn't so serious, it would be funny.' Financial meltdown followed by threats of player revolts, suspicions over betting patterns and a doping fiasco, the last few years have seen so many self-inflicted wounds it is amazing the governing body of the men's game hasn't bled to death.'"...Michael Stich on the decline of Wimbledon: "Let's take a guy like Carlos Moya, who I like and respect. He refused to come to Wimbledon early in his career but now he is here because he believes the surface and the balls are set up for him to do well, maybe not to win the championship but to get through a few matches. It is good for the game that those guys are here, but not good for the game that they are only here because the surface has changed."...Greg Rusedski brought the hammer down about not getting support during his drug case from certain individuals: "Some people -- including players -- said I made a mistake in going public about my test, but I had no choice. It was starting to leak out. Two of those players who criticized me were Todd Martin and Todd Woodbridge. They didn't even read the facts about the situation or the press statement."...Serena on her acting ability: "Well, I'm real dramatic, as well. I just have a good scream, but I'm also really funny and have a great personality on the camera and also have a really good laugh. At any given moment, I can just laugh. It doesn't matter." As Jon Lovitz used to say, "Acting!"...Iva Majoli, who beat Martina Hingis in the 1997 French Open final, is quitting tennis at 26 after getting out of shape and plunging in the rankings: "It's over. I will not play tennis any more. Maybe I will play some exhibition or doubles but my career is over. I realized that I fell too low. I am practically at the beginning and I would have to work like a maniac to get back to the top. I am not ready to do that." Nice work ethic.


Wow. Talk about the more things change...