Saturday, December 31, 2011

And So It Begins...

by Savannah

It seems that the tennis "off season" is getting shorter and shorter. Why not since I dare anyone to say 2011 dragged. When young people are saying the year flew by it did. Back in the day I remember the years seeming just the right length, not as long as when I was a child but not as fleeting as an image in a rear view mirror.

Spain closed out the season winning the Davis Cup and starting this past Wednesday the draws, qualifying and main, started appearing for what is called the 2012 Australian summer hard court season. Amazing.

We've also had our first tennis media generated tempest in a teapot as well. Rafael Nadal announced he's taking February off to rest his shoulder. The Grand Poobahs seem to believe he should've kept that to himself or waited until after the Australian Open. Why? Rafa doesn't make the spring South American clay court swing, hasn't in years. And the USTA has two Masters Series, back to back, in March. On hard courts. My guess is that the big media boys wanted a chance to break some news. I say good for Rafa. In this digital age it's stupid to sit on something. Rafa broke his own news. More power to him.

Serena Williams has posted the first of her bikini pictures series proudly showing off what brings grown men, and young boys, to their knees. What is she supposed to wear a burkha? Please. If you're not ready for that large a serving of boo-tae the salad bar is to the left.

I'm still waiting for an explanation as to why Caroline Wozniacki's romance is headline news. I guess I missed a memo again.

And while I'm at it why does the WTA set up photoshoots of it's top, and not so top, players in soft porn poses? If I was inclined to like to look at sexy half naked women there are places on the interwebs for that. I mean it's nice to show the players off as attractive women but the idea that all women tennis players moonlight at tractor pulls is long gone isn't it? Now if there are shots of half naked sweaty men around I'm all in. I mean there are but those are usually taken after a warm up, practice or match. I do have my standards though. I mean clothed or not Marat Safin is one hot piece of manflesh no?

I was watching a match at the annual Abu Dhabi money grab and the British announcers gushed about new ATP CEO Brad Drewitt's cherished goal of instituting a time clock similar to what they use in the NBA. I narrowed my eyes so hard I fell asleep. I mean is that going to help the Americans or Brits win a major? I.Don't.Think.So. Just saying. By the way I'm glad I double checked his name. I was trying to name him Adam. I guess that's because "The Young and the Restless" was on in the hairdresser the other day. I mean that has to be it. I barely knew the name of the guy who preceded Adam, uh, Brad. Yep. Has to be Victor Newman's spawn that caused me to misname Mr. Drewitt.

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Do I have to go into the spiel about how special 2012 is because it's an Olympic year? No? Good. For those who need to hear about it here we go: blah, blah, blah, Olympics, blah, blah, blah, Fed Cup, blah, blah, blah, Davis Cup, blah, blah, blah, heavy playing schedule, yadda yadda yadda etc., etc., etc. Capiche? Good.

I wish all my readers a safe, happy, healthy and prosperous New Year. If you wake up under a table and it feels like you've had a sock in your mouth while you were passed out or there are unexplainable wet spots over what's left of your clothing just roll over and go back to sleep. Oh, and watch out for that pool of, well, whatever it is.

And if your New Year's celebration includes shooting a gun out of your window please remember that bullets don't have eyes and while you don't intend to hurt anyone there's a chance you will.

1 comment:

vw said...

Just wanted to add that Alisa Kleybs has finished her chemo and radiation. I wish her a CLEAN bill of health.
Happy New Year to all here.