Hi all. It's me, MV!
It’s so wonderful here! Warm weather, sun, and not a freakin’ camel in sight! Ain’t life grand?
My Captain and I have barely had a chance to enjoy his latest victory. It was extra sweet because he took the title from The Boy. Kid seems to be slumping lately. Maybe a little less dancing on bar tops and more practice is what he needs…well, for me he can keep dancing on them. We like the results of his dancing so far.
I am also very proud of my Captain. When the now infamous Las Vegas debacle took place who did Etienne reach out to? Not the President of the Player’s Union (Heaven only knows what that turnip head would have counseled) but to my Captain and those who were still here to serve him. I mean serve in the tennis sense of course. I have to be careful about what I say here. I mention the Captain’s ruminations about genuflecting and lo and behold some nitwit does just that, on court in full public view. After that he told me I should always begin conversations with him by saying “My Lord”. When I finished with him he was thanking me for calling him by his proper name. Those English swear words are great aren’t they? I love using them as proper nouns.
But I digress. Etienne is always very concerned about how my Captain feels about things. I wish that those who question Etienne’s actions in calling my Captain instead of the President of the Player’s Council would take a moment to reflect on his present status in the game. The other players were just feeding him grapes and fanning him when the call came through. One of them was so nice as to hold the phone while Etienne and my Captain conversed. In addition to setting up their next golf date Etienne explained what had happened and asked my Captains opinion.
Isn’t it obvious that he couldn’t call the President of the Player’s Council when it was the Vice President of the same council who was trying to get the rules changed. Who else was he going to call, The Boy? Last I saw him they were pulling him down from another bar top. Kids got some spirit I tell you but he’s hardly the person you want to talk to about matters like this.
Anyway my Captain spoke with his assembled court…I mean his fellow players and they got on a call with Etienne and told him it would not be a good idea to change rules mid tournament. If that was the case you’d have chair umpires who had big enough balls to say a machine call was wrong and award the point properly. If that happens who knows who the Captain might have to meet in the Finals of an event? He still has nightmares about the Boy despite what’s going on with him now. Better he meet one of his truly loyal subjects who understands that his role in life is to assist my Captain in attaining his goals not to actually contest a match with him. As long as they do their groveling in private I don’t see what’s wrong with things the way they are. Do you?
As you can see I’m under much better control now. I’ve told El Senor to leave me alone regarding El Regalo Grande and he seems to have respected my wishes. I have been getting e-mails from this Russian woman living in New York who seems to think El Senor is my soul mate. I told Miss Soul M8 that I’m perfectly happy with the man I have. I’ve attached a picture so the world can see his fabulous body. Just leaves you breathless doesn’t it? I don’t know what they see in The Boy or that tall Tatar. Makes me wonder about women today.
I do have a few observations before I sign off. As you all know Mrs. ComeON!’s request to become a blogger for the WAGS was assigned to my screening committee. I almost spit out my coffee when I saw she was “blogging” for the Las Vegas event. That should have been a tip off that the inmates were truly in charge of that asylum. The woman can barely spell her name. I wonder who really wrote the blog? It takes her so long to put her thoughts into words I’m sure someone just wrote whatever Mr. ComeON told them to. Poor Mrs. ComeOn! probably couldn’t hear well with all that wind whistling through her head.
On a positive note HFPY sent me an e-mail saying he will be doing fashion commentary for the WAGS from both Indian Wells and Miami! Isn’t that great news? I can’t wait to read his first column!
Well I have to go now. His Lordship is bellowing for me to come and lift his feet so he can put his sneakers on. I have to call one of Etienne’s employees to come up and help him. Lift his feet today and I’ll be wiping…well, let’s just say bathroom patrol would be next.
TTFN
4 comments:
hey, it's not my fault I keep channelling Tio Toni. After that restraining order you put on him, this is the only way he can reach out (and touch you). And to think, all he did was reach out for some help with the Boy's bartop-dancing tendencies. He thought your true feelings would prevail, but it seems your fondness for financial security... er, your relationship with the Captain is higher.
In other news, your description of the Mr. Disney - Captain dynamic seems quite accurate as this week's weeping boy, I mean, Mr. Odd Salute, said in an interview that his knowledge of what went on was limited to what was in the newspapers. Guess someone mixed up "Player's Council" and "a player's counsel." Mr. Salute also went on about how there should be more solidarity and players sticking up for each other. In more realistic plans, he's shaving his beard off, HFPY was happy to learn.
Be careful there in the bathroom. We all remember how scared he got by that toilet in Japan.
Oh Hi Ms Soul M8. Don't most women believe in financial security, uh, love?
Mr. Odd Salute is a loyal subject. He always does what the Captain tells him to frustrate the Boy and then plays his role to a "t" when playing the Captain. Nice guy.
I must beg you Ms M8 not to mention toilets. That Japanese monstrosity has finally been put where it belongs - at the bottom of the lake on our property in Switzerland. I had it done while we were in Dubai. I don't think he'll notice.
Oh, by the way how is El Senor? I don't want him to start e-mailing me again but a girl gets used to reading about, well, you know. El Regalo Grande. There I've said it. I've been re reading his messages...for information purposes of course.
I must go. Time for practice. TTFN. And say hello to El Senor for me 'k?
El Tio has his hands full with voodoo dolls of Mr. Odd Salute and his coach, Mr. Russian Brian Barker. I understand that has been the reason Mr. Salute tends to do so horribly in California and Miami.
But while his hands are full, el Regalo is flying freely... think about that for a while...
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